


Maybe The Last Time

by rufferto



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Adventure, Dean is bad with feelings, Drama, Dubcon leaning towards rape, Light BDSM, M/M, Original OCS - Freeform, Romance, Wincest - Freeform, old fic i had written in 2007, sam has feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-25
Updated: 2018-02-25
Packaged: 2019-03-23 18:21:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 15
Words: 20,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13793481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rufferto/pseuds/rufferto
Summary: TIMELINE: Just after Season 2.SCENARIO: There’s no rest for the wicked, Sam has a year to tell Dean how he feels. It’s just all wrong now; he should have said something before. Sam has them go investigate a series of sudden deaths and a witness admitted to an asylum. The boys go to Vale End Cemetery in Nashua, New Hampshire.I wrote this in November 2007 and posted it onto a collection site in Livejournal as my username Rufferto





	1. Chapter 1 Mercy, Mercy

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is a very old fic that I wrote in 2007 This was written in 2007 and published by my Livejournal to a Wincest community. I wrote it. It is mine. I'm going to try and get all my fiction onto Archive of Our Own. It's a process, but it will be worth it in the end. 
> 
> A few notes about the fic. 
> 
> The title is from a Rolling Stones song and the chapters are all Rolling Stones Songs.  
> I wrote this before I knew what was going to happen to Dean.  
> My Supernatural Fics usually read like episodes.  
> Keep in mind this was more than 10 years ago.

Chapter One  
  
Nashua, New Hampshire.  
  
Sam stifled a groan and shifted in bed. Lately, it was just impossible to sleep. He sighed and looked over at the irritatingly peaceful form of his beloved older brother. Dean was sleeping pleasantly, curled up in his blankets. They’d hit Nashua pretty late that night and they were both tired from driving. Dean had almost immediately passed out. He was odd that way, he could sleep so quickly. Sam took hours to fall asleep and these days he was lucky if he got one or two a night.  
  
He kept going over the job in his head. A boy by the name of Edward D’Moya was admitted to psychiatric care after witnessing his brother have a heart attack just outside Vale End Cemetery while they were visiting their father’s grave. That wasn’t the only reported death linked to Vale End Cemetery. Local legend had turned up several cases of sudden unexplained deaths in the area. Dean had insisted it was just local superstition, but something about this particular incident struck Sam as odd because the brokers had been at the cemetery a week earlier at another funeral and apparently during the funeral the Edward had screamed and cried out, no explanation why.  
  
“Sammy” Dean muttered under his breath. “You’re tossing and turning again.”  
  
“Thought you were asleep, sorry” Sam whispered.  
  
“I was asleep.” Dean grunted and yawned. “Then you started tossing and turning.”  
  
Sam sighed and sat up. “I wasn’t making that much noise.”  
  
“You didn’t have to; your brain was loud enough that your mouth didn’t even need to kick in.” Dean opened his eyes and glanced over at his brother. “What is wrong with you, Sam? You’ve been acting prissy for the last week. It’s driving me crazy.”  
  
“I don’t act prissy.” Sam snorted. “You’re just… unbelievable sometimes and it annoys me.”  
  
“So you act prissy.” Dean smirked.  
  
Sam rolled his eyes. “Dean.” He groaned. “You really have no idea do you?”  
  
How could Dean –possibly know how upset he was? He’d never told his brother, after all. He’d never let on the real reason why he’d have taken any excuse to leave. God, sometimes he let himself think about it, just a little and it tore him inside.  
  
“How am I supposed to know what goes on inside your head, Sammy?” Dean closed his eyes again.  
  
“Sorry.” Sam mumbled and rubbed his arms. He let his eyes rest on Dean’s lips. They were the most perfect lips in the world. They were soft and full and yet hard at the same time. No, Dean had no idea how much he wanted to run his tongue along those lips. God, if Dean knew the real reason he didn’t hit on chicks as much as his brother did. Sam shuddered.  
  
“You cold Sam?” Dean opened his eyes.  
  
“Yeah, a little, I hate this time of year.”  
  
“Huhm, yeah. I hear ya. Come over here.” Dean patted the bed next to him and scooted over a little.  
  
Sam’s body had a mind of its own. An invitation to be next to Dean could not be ignored. He didn’t hesitate. “You sure you don’t mind?”  
  
“Nah.” Dean slipped an arm around Sam’s shoulders. “You were cold a lot when you were a kid.”  
  
If he’d only known the reason why, Sam grinned to himself. He snuggled into Dean’s arm and basked in the attention. He loved it when Dean let him do this; it wasn’t often and certainly hadn’t happened in a while. He could listen to his brother’s heart beat and it would comfort him no matter what was out there in the dark.  
  
Sam felt Dean’s fingers rest in his hair. He knew they’d never talk about this. They’d been through so much. Dean was stroking his hair, soothing him. God, it felt so good. It had been so long since he’d felt so close to the man he loved more than life itself. That was when his body decided that he was a little too close to Dean and his cock was starting to react.  
  
He was about to find an excuse to sit up when something happened that made him give a squeak of surprise. Dean’s hand covered his hard cock. No words were spoken; Dean just held him with one arm and stroked him with his free hand. He didn’t dare look at his brother or say anything. If it was a dream, he didn’t want to wake up.  
  
Dean’s fingers slipped under his boxers and grasped his cock. God, he was so good at this. Sam’s legs slid apart slightly, he grasped Dean’s undershirt and panted heavily. It was actually happening, oh God, it was happening. He closed his eyes tight and sucked in his breath. His body was singing, electrified by Dean’s fingers. They pulled on his cock, stroked his balls, and encouraged him to come. He didn’t want to; he just wanted this to last as long as possible. He trembled and heard his brother whisper. “I’ve got you, Sammy.”  
  
He wanted to open his eyes, turn his face up and look at Dean but he was afraid of what he’d see there, he was terrified. He lifted his hips into merciless fingers drawing out the cry from his lips. It started at the tip of his toes and washed over him like a wave. It ripped him out of his body to someplace that wasn’t real. He came hard and whimpered. His face was hot and his body warm. He couldn’t move and he couldn’t speak. He pressed his head into Dean’s shoulder.  
  
Dean simply reached for something to clean his hand with and held him. His body already missed the fire from his brother's skilled fingers. He cleared his throat to speak.  
  
“Just sleep, Sam.” Dean’s grip tightened.  
  
Sam made a mental note to make sure to talk about this to Dean when he woke up. He’d just had the most amazing hand job in his life. He yawned and pressed a kiss against Dean’s chest. “Thank you.” He whispered.  
  
*  
  
When Sam woke up he was in his own bed. The sun was streaming in the window and Dean was in the shower. He took a moment to lose the fuzzy feeling of just waking up. Had it been a dream? How’d he get back to his own bed? He didn’t remember.  
  
Sam lay on his bed for a long time propped up on his elbows.  
  
“You gonna sleep all day, Princess?” Dean wondered as he walked out of the shower, towel wrapped around him.  
Sam couldn’t help staring, then he flushed. “No uh, you’re right we need to check out the cemetery. Dean…”  
  
“What?” Dean put a pair of fresh jeans down on the bed.  
  
“Did um.” Sam started to say and then stopped himself. “Did you uhm…” Shit, how the hell do you ask your brother if something like what happened last night was a dream?  
  
“Yeah.” Dean shrugged it off. “You were cold, I warmed you up. End of story. Now take a shower and let’s get some work done.”  
  
Sam stared at Dean, aghast. “End of story? That’s all you can say?”  
  
“It worked didn’t it? We both finally got some sleep.”  
  
Sam jumped to his feet. “You are such a fucking jerk sometimes, Dean.” He stalked into the shower and slammed the door behind him.  
  
Dean just shook his head in confusion.  
  
TBC 


	2. Chapter 2 Good Times

CHAPTER TWO  
  
Sam tried to focus on the job. Unfortunately as they had breakfast he couldn’t stop staring at Dean’s lips and hands. His fucking cock reacted whenever Dean used his hands for something. Shit, it was almost like a drug and he couldn’t shake it. What was worse is that he couldn’t talk about it. Dean was notorious for not sharing and caring. How could he think that doing that wouldn’t change a thing between them? Hell, for that matter, why did he do it –now- when he had ample opportunity in the past and never took it? Sam poked at his breakfast which was unusual for him given that he usually ate like a horse.

  
“Dude, you’re not eating?” Dean eyed his brother.  
  
“Not really hungry.” Sam shook his head, his eyes lowered.  
  
“You’re acting funny lately, what’s wrong with you?” Dean demanded. He apparently hadn’t even considered the fact that he had something to do with it.  
  
“It’s nothing.” Sam shook his head. “Really, it’s nothing.” He took a shaky breath and stuffed food in his mouth. “There, happy?” He said with his mouth full.  
  
“Thought maybe it was your time of the month” Dean shrugged with a smirk.  
  
Sam gave him a death glare and stabbed his eggs with his fork in annoyance.  
  
“So, I read the local rag this morning while you were sleeping. It says that the kid, Eddie D’Moya is a descendant of a local legend, Mary Ritter Spaulding. Apparently people perform all kinds of rituals near her tombstone. Eddie says his brother Charles was ‘touched’ by a ‘force of red’ and started chasing him through the cemetery intent on killing him, and then he dropped dead. Official diagnosis is Heart Attack. The dude was 23, I don’t buy it. They had been visiting their father’s grave which is coincidentally, near this chick Mary. Local legend calls her the Blue Lady. So I’m thinking she’s behind a lot of these incidents. Seems to be a lot of similar stories about heart attack victims in the area, so I read up and guess what?”  
  
“What?” Sam was still surprised Dean had actually done all this research already.  
  
“Her husband, Isaac died of heart failure.”  
  
“Huh.” Sam considered. “Could be the connection, did she have any reason to be upset or angry?”  
  
“I don’t know. The only other records indicate a missing child, James Spaulding. She says she had him but he’s not on record.”  
  
“It seems too easy to be a traditional haunting.” Sam frowned as he listened. “We need to talk to the kid Eddie. How old is he?”  
  
“14” Dean said. He leaned back in his booth and watched Sam finish his breakfast.  
  
Sam knew that if he didn’t finish it, Dean would hound him about what was wrong. As much as he wanted to talk about it, he knew Dean would shoot him down. Besides, it should be obvious what –was- wrong. One year with Dean was not enough time. He’d wasted so much time before and now he had a second chance, but it wasn’t enough time and he couldn’t be angry. He had no right to be angry. He knew he would have done the same thing, but God. Why? What had they done to deserve this life? Why him? He forced his mind back on their current job but couldn’t stop watching Dean’s fingers as they idly stroked his glass.  
  
Why did his body have no control? He willed himself to settle down and vowed to have one hell of a cold shower that night. Why did Dean have to make the simplest thing so damn sexy? He watched the condensation from the orange juice glass pool on his brother’s finger and drip down into his palm. Jesus, God, he wanted to lick that off of Dean’s hand. He wondered if his cum had looked the same.  
  
Sam swallowed. “So, uh” he cleared his throat. “What’s the Asylum like?”  
  
“Pretty typical” Dean smiled. “We should be able to get in, they let the patients walk around outside. We ought to be able to find Eddie easily as a pair of orderlies.”  
  
“You’ve been busy this morning.” Sam said with a smile. “Usually I’m the one waiting for you to wake up.”  
  
Dean laughed, “Well, you needed your sleep.” He drank the last of his juice. “I uh moved you because the sheets were a bit…” he cleared his throat, “sticky from last night.”  
  
Sam stared at Dean. Was his brother actually acknowledging that something happened? “Dean, I—“ He began.  
  
Dean shifted in the booth. “What I did last night, Sammy, I don’t know what I was thinking. I know you’ve got your panties in a bunch about it this morning and I’m sorry. Ok? It shouldn’t have happened.”  
  
“I’m not.” Sam said automatically. “Sorry, I mean.”  
  
It was Dean’s turn to stare at Sam. “You uh” He couldn’t think of a single comeback to that statement. “Liked that?” It was the first time Sam had ever seen his brother stammer.  
  
Sam smiled. It was a slow, lazy smile that caught at one end of his lips and worked its way to the other then became a brilliant flash of light. “I loved it, Dean.”  
  
Dean found himself wishing that they were at a bar and he could order a shot. He quickly changed the subject, “Are you done eating?” He looked around desperately for the waitress. “We should go to the Asylum, now.”  
  
“I’m done eating.” Sam nodded. As they headed to the Impala, he wondered how much it would take to get Dean to give him pleasure like that on purpose.  
  
*  
  
Eddie D’Moya was obviously a very disturbed young man. He was thin and gangling with a generous mop of ash blonde hair and brilliant green eyes. He spent his time outside pacing around to expel nervous energy. The single most traumatic moment of his life was all over every tabloid in the county and even the other inmates thought he was a whacko. What he’d seen though, he’d never forget and he knew he hadn’t made it up. His brother had turned into a raving psychopath in front of his eyes, and Eddie had seen the red figures, but no one believed him. So when a tall brunette and a shorter dark blonde man approached him, he was naturally suspicious when they started talking to him.  
  
“Hey, I’m Sam and this is Dean. We’re new here.” Sam said kindly. “We were assigned to your ward and we’re just getting to know our patients.”  
  
“Yeah.” Eddie raised an eyebrow.  
  
“So how come you’re not hanging around with…” Dean was about to say something inappropriate but stopped when Sam nudged him.  
  
“Other psychos? It’s ok, man. I get why I’m in here.” Eddie smirked.  
  
“Sorry about him, he’s just getting used to the job.” Sam said apologetically. “You don’t look like one, actually.”  
  
“That’s because I’m not.” Eddie folded his arms. “My aunt stuck me in here, but I’m NOT a psycho.”  
  
“Why did she stick you in here then?”  
  
“Because they say I was seeing things, that what happened was impossible. They think I’m a danger to myself, man. I would never…” Eddie started to look upset.  
  
“Easy.” Dean interjected. “Hey, it’s ok. What did happen?”  
  
They sat down on the bench with Eddie who sighed. “We go there every Sunday, you know to visit his grave. I always hated the place but Charlie insisted that we pay our respects. He wanted to be a preacher.” Eddie shook his head. “It was broad daylight around 1pm. We were alone in that part of the graveyard. I noticed new coins on the Blue Lady’s grave so someone had been there recently. Charlie had told me that it was superstitious nonsense; he picked up one of the coins and tossed it across the cemetery to prove his point. We got to our father’s grave and I put the fresh flowers down. We had been there only a few minutes when I saw… them.”  
  
“Them who?” Sam glanced at Dean and looked back at Eddie, “Who’d you see?”  
  
“Red lights.” He swallowed. “Little red lights, dozens of them, they’d circled around us. Charlie pretended not to see them. Each one had the most awful face, like varying degrees of death.” Eddie shuddered. “Then they laughed. The sound made my blood freeze and Charlie…” He snuffled a bit. “They vanished a few minutes later and I looked up at Charlie. His eyes…”  
Dean and Sam glanced at each other, “Were they Black?” Sam asked.  
  
“No, they were blood red.” Eddie eyed them. “Wait, you believe me? That would be a first.” He muttered. “Then Charlie took a swing at me. He’s never tried to hurt me before, ever. He called me things, said he was going to…” Eddie swallowed. “Beat the evil out of me. I ran and he chased me. We got to the edge of the graveyard and… he dropped dead. It was like the life was sucked out of him.”  
  
Sam put a reassuring hand on Eddie’s shoulder. “We believe you and I tell you what. We’re going to do whatever we can to find what did this to your brother and get rid of it. I promise.”  
  
Dean frowned, not so sure they should be making those kinds of promises.  
  
TBC.


	3. Chapter 3 Out of Our Heads

Chapter Three  
  
“So.” Sam sat in the passenger seat of the Impala as he eyed Dean. “This guy Charlie is possessed with red eyes and tries to kill his brother, sounds like a fun place to hang out.”  
  
“And this was in broad daylight.” Dean parked the Impala at the parking lot outside the graveyard. “Looks normal enough.”  
  
The cemetery was on top of a hill near Nashua in a place called Wilton. “So is there anything more about this Mary Ritter Spaulding?” Sam asked.  
  
“There are a lot of rumors, Sam, but no hard facts. We’ll have to research it at the local library. They seem to all be pointing in the direction of the death of her youngest child and that she was very likely murdered.” Dean stepped out of the Impala and pulled out his EMF meter. “She could just as easily have died in her sleep. There are too many stories to pin point one.”  
  
It almost immediately went to full. “Well, that’s never happened.” He knocked it slightly but it still remained at full.  
  
“Is it working right?”  
  
“Of course it is!” Dean said in annoyance. “It’s just never done this before.”  
  
“It’s all around us.” Sam shuddered.  
  
“Yeah. I’d say there’s something here.” Dean had to agree.  
  
Sam glanced over at the forest. “Whatever it is, is watching us.”  
  
“Well as long as it stays put.”  
  
“Let’s find their father’s grave.”  
  
As they walked through the cemetery, Sam shivered several times. Dean was busy trying to fix the EMF reader. It was impossible to discern where the main activity was. “So Eddie said his father’s grave is near where the Blue Lady is buried.” Sam started checking out grave names.  
  
“It would be in the older section of the graveyard.” Dean said. He stopped suddenly in his tracks. “Fuck…”  
  
Standing right before him was a beautiful woman. Drop dead gorgeous with bright blonde hair and a to die for smile. She looked like she might be wearing early eighteenth century clothing. The lady’s eyes shone like blue diamonds and mesmerized Dean.  
  
“Dean, what?” Sam stopped and turned around. His brother was standing still, staring straight ahead. Before Sam could get back to him he saw Dean reel backwards and barely keep standing from the force of something that must have hit him.  
  
Dean had attempted to talk to the woman but she had slapped him hard and vanished. “Dude, I didn’t even say one word.”  
  
“What happened?”  
  
“I got slapped.”  
  
“I can see that.” Sam noted the red spot on his brother’s cheek. “What did you do?”  
  
“Nothin! I looked at her and she slapped me!”  
  
“Her who? Mary Ritter?”  
  
“How the hell should I know Sam? I don’t know what she looked like. Besides this woman was young, didn’t look like she’d had as many children as Mary did.”  
  
“Dean.”  
  
“What?”  
  
“I think I know why you pissed her off.”  
  
Sam pointed downwards.  
  
Dean was standing on some flowers by a grave; he’d crushed them under his boots. He stepped back off them and looked at the name on the gravestone. “Elizabeth Snider, beloved daughter. Sorry, Lizzy.” Dean tried. “You think she’ll leave me alone now? I mean come on, how many spirits get pissed off because you accidentally step on their flowers?”  
  
“I don’t think it’s them, Dean. I think it’s this place. Something has made a lot of people here restless.” Sam said.  
  
“Ya think?” Dean muttered rubbing the side of his face.  
  
They found Mary Ritter’s grave and Sam raised an eyebrow at the fact there was even a sign asking not to touch anything on her grave. “This isn’t going to be fun.”  
  
“Hey!” A voice called out.  
  
Sam and Dean looked towards a man who approached them. He was a large beefy fellow in dirty clothing and walked with a cane.  
  
‘You boys better not be thinking of taking anything. I’ve got my eye on you, I have!” The old man loomed. “Have to stay around here now, lots of freaks. Go on, perform whatever ritual or new fangled thing you ghost hunters have but don’t you touch her or there will be hell to pay.”  
  
“Uh- hi.” Sam smiled widely. “We wouldn’t dream of hurting Mary’s grave. I’m Sam and this is Dean we…”  
  
“Let me guess, ya look for Ghosts?”  
  
Dean cleared his throat. “Demons actually, seen any?”  
  
“Mary Ritter ain’t no demon.” The large man shifted his weight. “Seen all types of you folk. Can’t mind your own business and have to come traipsing around here looking for god only knows what. “And I seen lots, but I seen no demons here.”  
  
“With all due respect, Mr…uh?”  
  
“Bently. George Bently. Caretaker of Vale End.”  
  
“George, hey, cool name. ” Dean said swiftly. “There are a lot of eye witnesses that say they have. Who’s the expert on this graveyard around here?”  
  
“Oh, that’d be Lindsay Spaulding. She lives on Water street and runs a Tea House.”  
  
“A tea house.” Dean’s eyes bulged and Sam snickered.  
  
“Aye.”  
  
*  
  
“Looks like we’ll have to come back here at night.” Dean got into the Impala. “Guy creeps me out. Man, the whole place is bad. We can’t cleanse an entire graveyard, Sam.”  
  
“There’s something infecting it, we just get what’s doing that.”  
  
Dean tried starting the Impala and it just revved up but didn’t start. “Fuck.” He tried it again. “What the hell. It says I’m out of gas. I never run out of gas.”  
  
Sam tensed as he glanced around. The Caretaker was gone and it was the middle of the afternoon. Yet something wasn’t right. He didn’t like this at all. That’s when he saw the child.  
  
A little boy stood at the top of a hill staring down at them. He wore a black suit, the kind someone from the nineteenth century might have worn as they were buried. He had perfectly arranged black hair and looked to be about ten years old. He was staring right at them.  
  
‘We didn’t run out of gas Dean, they’re not letting us leave.”  
  
“What do you mean they’re not letting us leave? What are you seeing, Sam?”  
  
“You don’t see him?”  
  
“No.” Dean looked to where Sam was pointing. He turned the car on again. “Come on, baby. Work with me.”  
  
Sam eyed the ten year old for a long time. They locked gazes. The child’s eyes were blood red and Sam knew he was getting a warning. Then suddenly there were about hundred ghosts surrounding their car all from various walks of life and all of them were screaming at him. The din combined with Dean trying to start his car and cursing made Sam cry out in pain and hold his hands over his ears. “Stop it, stop it!”  
  
“Hey.. Hey.” Dean reached over and Sam batted his hand away.  
  
“Get away from me!” Sam moaned. “Leave me alone!”  
  
The car started to shake because they were pushing it back and forth. Dean couldn’t see a thing. “Jesus Christ.” He tried to get out of the Impala, but the doors wouldn’t open. “Sammy, what’s going on?”  
  
Suddenly the car started and the pedal hit the floor. It shot forward down the road and careened the corner. Dean couldn’t keep control of the wheel and the side of the car slammed into a tree.  
  
A column of smoke rose from the Impala’s engine and the horn wouldn’t stop. It wasn’t totaled like last time, fortunately the bush by the tree had stopped any major damage.  
  
Dean was slumped over the wheel.  
  
The windshield was cracked and Sam was out cold.  
  
From the top of the hill, the boy smiled.  
  
The radio in the car started to play as though it had simply tuned into that song on purpose.  
  
Dean opened his eyes.  
  
_“I was around when Jesus Christ_  
 _Had his moment of doubt and pain._  
 _Made damn sure that Pilate_  
 _Washed his hands and sealed his fate”_  
  
When Dean looked over at Sam's it was just as well Sam was out cold, for Dean's eyes were blood red and he saw them in the mirror. They stayed that way for a split second and his eyes were normal again. He blinked in confusion and immediately turned his attention to Sam.   
  
“Sammy!” He shook at his brother, “Oh God…!”  
  
_“Pleased to meet you_  
 _Hope you guess my name_  
 _But what's puzzling you_  
 _Is the nature of my game”_  
  
Dean reached over and felt for Sam’s pulse. “You’re alive, Oh thank God. Sammy, wake up, please, please!”  
  
A siren wailed in the distance.  
  
  
  
TBC 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AUTHOR’S NOTE: The lyrics are from Rolling Stones “Sympathy for the Devil”  
> AUTHOR'S NOTE PART DEUX: Sorry I wasn't clear. It was Dean's eyes that went red, not Sam's. Sam was out cold.


	4. Chapter 4 Hitch Hike a Soul

Chapter Four  
  
When it comes to Sam Winchester, all of Dean’s composure is ripped to hell. The accident really hadn’t been that bad and he could easily fix the damage to the car. At least it was still running. They’d be able to make it back to Bobby’s when they left Nashua. And they ought to leave Nashua sooner rather than later.  
  
They hadn’t had to go to the hospital but they did get back to the motel. Sam had been quiet the entire time, avoiding Dean’s eyes in spite of the fussing. He’d had experiences with Spirits before pulling crap but never had they been literally thrown out of a cemetery before and never in the middle of the day. Something big was going on in Vale End and Dean was committed now to finding the son of a bitch and getting rid of it, especially since it had damaged the Impala.  
  
They’d ordered take out. Sam immediately pulled out his computer and was researching, focused entirely on that.  
  
It was weird. The entire situation left him very unsettled. Even as Winchesters they’d never run into something like this before and Sam jumpy and nervous.  
  
Dean knew better than to continue to ask if Sam was okay.  He called Bobby for a list of parts he’d need for the Impala when they came up next. When Bobby asked if they were alright, he just simply shrugged. “We’ll live. But, hey have you heard anything about demons with red eyes?”  
“Demons come in all sorts of shapes and sizes, Dean.” Bobby said after a while. “Where are you boys again?”  
  
“New Hampshire.” Dean responded. “We ran into trouble at a local not too friendly Cemetery. Have you heard of Vale End?”  
  
“Who hasn’t.” Bobby laughed. “Every idjit Ghost nut has visited that place for decades, Dean. No hunters have even come close to finding the thing. You may as well be looking for a needle in a haystack. It’s clever and manipulative. I’ve heard of the red lights there and the satanic church that burnt down and a whole manner of implausible rumors about what does or does not happen at Vale End. As far as red eyes go, I’d say it was a particular demon like our yellow eyed one. It’s not normal. It doesn’t mind Ghost Hunters but it tricks and plays with Hunters until they get frustrated and leave. Or…”  
  
“Or what?”  
  
“They die. I think you should just chalk it up to experience and move on.”  
  
“How many hunters have died because of Vale End, Bobby?”  
  
“Six or seven, I don’t know, I’d have to look up my old records.”  
  
“Jesus Christ.” Dean sighed into the phone. “Ok, I’ll tell Sam. Thanks Bobby.”  
  
Sam stared at Dean as he hung up his cell. “What is it?”  
  
“We’ve got a problem, Sam.” He stretched his legs out as he stared at his brother and explained everything Bobby said.  
  
“We can’t just leave!” Sam protested. “That thing has started to hurt the townspeople here now even if it has been benevolent in the past.”  
  
“Sam, it’s not worth it, ok. I don’t want to risk it. I’ve only got so much time with you and I don’t want to spend it in a fucking hospital, ok?” Dean said, voice rising.  
  
“Hey, take it easy…sorry.” Sam said softly. “You look a little flushed, Dean, maybe you should lie down.”  
  
“Why don’t we both lie down? You passed out for a lot longer than I did. And what happened in the car? Why did you freak out like that, Sammy? Talk to me.” Dean rose to pull down the comforter of his bed. The maid had since changed it.  
  
Sam sucked in his breath as he watched Dean pull off his jacket. “I don’t know. I felt like a hundred voices were screaming in my head, and then I saw the boy. It was weird. It didn’t hurt like my visions usually did it was just making me crazy.”  
  
“Maybe it’s some kind of after effect?” Dean sat on the edge of his bed and pulled off his boots.  
  
“I don’t know.” Sam rubbed his forehead and swallowed as Dean removed his shirt. He tapped a pencil nervously on the table. “I think it was a warning, I mean, you have to admit, it could have been a lot worse.”  
  
Dean undid his jeans and Sam temperature began to rise. “What?” Dean asked him, as he tossed his jeans on the floor. “Oh…” The realization dawned on him and he remembered the conversation earlier that day. “I always sleep like this man. You’re not going to wig out on me, are you and become all prudish?”  
  
“Hmh.” Sam scoffed. “No.” He pointed looked away, however.  
  
Dean grinned. “If this is how you’re going to react when I’m only in my boxers, what are you going to do when I come out of the shower?”  
  
“Shut up, Dean.”  
  
“You really meant it this morning didn’t you?” Dean looked incredulous. “How many guys have fucked you, Sam?”  
  
Sam’s head shot up as he stared at his brother, face flushed. “What the hell kind of question…and what makes you think I’m a bottom?”  
  
“The fact that you know what being a bottom means answers that question. You –have- done it with a guy. Who? Did I know him?”  
  
“No!” Sam retorted. “We are so not having this conversation.”  
  
“Sammy, Sammy.” Dean chortled. “Wow, have I been way off base trying to throw you at chicks. I should have thrown you at Gordon.”  
  
“Don’t go there, man and stop grinning at me.” Sam grumbled. “You’re making me nauseous.”  
  
“No, I’m making you hot.” Dean winked, knowingly. “You are attracted to me. Big time.”  
  
“Shut –up-.” Sam scowled.  
  
“So if you’re not hot, come closer then.” Dean wiggled his finger at Sam.  
  
“You’re being a jerk.” Sam grunted. “Do you even want me, Dean? Or am I just something new to play with?”  
  
“Sammy, you’re not new and this isn’t a game. I know you want something from me and right now I want to give it to you. Take it or leave it.” Dean shrugged, “Just don’t be a girl about it.”  
  
“What are you offering, Dean?” Sam squinted at his brother, expression intent.  
  
“Anything you want.”  
  
“Well, what if I wanted to fuck you?”  
  
“Except that.”  
  
“Why not?”  
  
“Unlike you, I’m not a bottom, Sammy.” Dean said with a smirk.  
  
“You’ve done this before?” Sam’s eyebrows snapped together.  
  
“Sure, only I was usually pretty drunk at the time.” Dean admitted. “Sam, you’re ruining the moment, would you come over here already?”  
  
“No.” Sam shook his head, “No Dean, I’m not going to let you treat this like it’s just another one of your hook ups.”  
  
Dean stood up. “I think you’re being just a bit over dramatic here, Sam.”  
  
“Am I?” Sam’s temper began to rise. He hated it when Dean was condescending.  
  
“Hell, I don’t have time for romance, Sam.”  
  
He wasn’t sure how Dean did it, but suddenly his brother was in his face, hands on his jacket. He was pulled roughly to his feet and their lips connected.  
  
Sam’s body suddenly surged in reaction as Dean plunged his tongue past his lips thoroughly claiming them. No one had ever kissed him quite like this before, it was urgent and intense, all demand. It took away his breath, his sense, and anything he had that allowed him to think rationally. It consumed him like a raging inferno; Sam was powerless to stop it.  
  
Dean panted for breath against his brother’s lips. “That was a taste of true sin.” He whispered. “Let me fuck you. I know you want it and I’ve wanted to for a long time, Sammy.”  
  
Something went off in Sam’s head… an alarm bell.  
  
This just wasn’t right.  
  
The real question was: Did he care anymore?  
  
TBC 


	5. Chapter 5 Heart of Stone

  
Chapter Five  
  
Sam needed to find his brain in this haze of intensity. He could have sworn it was somewhere around. He’d stammered out a ‘no, not tonight’ and was given a scathing look from his brother. Dean had advanced on him anyway and practically torn off his jacket. Now there were hands everywhere, touching him, up his shirt, down his pants. Somewhere inside he knew what common sense was, and it was telling him to shove Dean away. His body, however, had a mind of its own and it had yearned for those hands for too long to let his brain interfere with what should have been the most perfect moment in his life.  
  
Dean somehow had him out of his shirt and his jeans unbuttoned. It was so intense he could hardly see straight. His hands were on Dean, trailing over his muscles, sliding down his back, touching and feeling in the way he’d always wanted to. God it felt so good. It was so deliciously good. Dean’s tongue. Dean’s tongue was more talented than his hands and he was licking Sam’s nipple, sucking it.  
  
Common sense was a thing of the past. Sam abandoned rationale thought when Dean’s hand was on his cock again and his jeans were shoved down to his knees. “Do you know how beautiful you are?” Dean asked him as he licked and kissed his way up Sam’s neck. He picked up one of Sam’s hands and sucked on a finger. “Perfect.”  
  
Sam laughed softly, “I’m not…”  
  
Dean lifted a finger to Sam’s lips. “Don’t.”  
  
“Don’t what?”  
  
“Sell yourself shot. You always do that.” Dean voice was a soft purr. One hand was already massaging Sam’s cock. “Do you know how much I want you? Touch me.”  
  
“I am touching you.” Sam’s hands were resting on Dean’s hips.  
  
“No, you’re not. You’re thinking about it but you haven’t turned off your brain yet. Ahh…I think I know what you need.”  
  
“Dean, we need to stop this.” Sam swallowed, not as long as Dean’s hand was doing what it was doing to him and … oh God. Dean lowered to his knees.  
  
“I don’t want to stop.” Dean gave him a look. He cradled Sam’s shaft in the palm of his hand. “I want you know what it really feels like to get your cock sucked.”  
  
Before Sam could stop him, Dean’s mouth was on the head of his cock, perfect lips sliding past the head and Sam’s world became something like a roller coaster ride, once you start, you can’t get off. Dean obviously had experience at this. Sam could only put his fingers in Dean’s hair and grasp onto his shoulder for support. Then that tongue began to drive him crazy. His lover’s fingers played with his balls, encouraging his legs to shift apart slightly. Sam couldn’t remember why he wanted to stop this. Tiny noises escalated into cries as Dean pretended his cock was the best tasting lolly in the entire world.  
  
A loud cry escaped Sam’s lips; he was going to come soon. It was too much to take in, too much feeling. His brother… Dean. His head reeled and he nearly collapsed. Dean must have sensed it because he guided Sam to the bed and shoved him down on it. Using his fingers, Dean rolled each sac, encouraging his brother to release himself. The more relaxed Sam was, the easier it would be to do what he wanted to do next.  
  
When Sam came, it was nothing like he’d ever experienced before, even the previous night. It was literally as if Dean was drawing it out of him. Sam’s seed filled his brother’s mouth even though he attempted to warn him. Dean pulled off land licked some of the seed from his lips. Sam couldn’t speak, he stared Dean in shock. That was when he saw the brief flash in Dean’s eyes, the spark of red.  
  
Dean kissed his way up Sam’s stomach. “I’m gonna fuck you now. “ He paused as he lay over his lover.  
  
“Dean!” Sam whispered. Half of him wanted to pretend he hadn’t seen the color change in his brother’s eyes. He wanted to die of shame because he couldn’t think of a way to stop this. He didn’t –want- to stop this. God, he was an awful person, he didn’t deserve this. Dean. He didn’t deserve Dean. “I want you to.” He rasped. Somehow he’d make this up. He only had one year with Dean; this might be his only chance to get what he really wanted and it was breaking his heart. “But you can’t. Not like this.”  
  
Dean raised an eyebrow. “What makes you think you’ll be able to stop me?”  
  
“Because this isn’t you.” Sam panted, desperately trying to reach Dean. He put his hand on his brother’s cheek. “Something’s happened to you and you’d never force me Dean. I know you. I can’t have this. Not like this. I can’t have you like this. It isn’t right. Please, let’s just…stop. Now.”  
  
“Stop now?” Dean growled at him. “You have the nerve to try and stop this? That’s a load of self righteous crap, Sammy. Fine.” Dean was off Sam in a shot. “If that’s what you want, fine. I’ll stop.” Dean grabbed a lamp and slammed it into the wall making Sam jump. It broke into a lot of tiny pieces as he stood there looking at it. They were silent for several moments while Dean stood in a rage and Sam pulled the bed covers around him. Dean found his clothing and started to put it on. “I’m going out. You rest. I’ll be back later.”  
  
“How much later?” Sam swallowed.  
  
“Don’t wait up.”  
  
“I thought we were going to the cemetery tonight?”  
  
“Fuck this town, Sammy, and Fuck that place. We’re leaving first thing in the morning.” Dean said tersely.  
  
“Dean!”  
  
Dean threw on his jacket and looked back at Sam. This time, the red was clearly there as he glared at his brother. “Pray I don’t come back until dawn, Sasquatch. Saying no to me more than once in a night isn’t likely to help. You think long and hard while I’m gone.” He got to the door and turned back again. His blood red eyes simply bored into Sam’s. “I’m going to have you and you’re not going to stop me next time.”  
  
Sam stared open mouthed as his brother stormed out of the room. What the hell had just happened? What was wrong with Dean? It didn’t seem like possession, it was more like some kind of drug. He got to his feet shakily. One thing was for sure, he wasn’t going to get any sleep. He had until morning to figure this out and get his brother back.  
  
How the hell were they going to get past this?  
  
If Dean only knew how much self control he had wrung out of himself tonight. His body still tingled from Dean’s touch. It was alive and humming with need. He would need to think fast and hopefully get some help.  
  
First, Sam had to put his clothes back on.  
  
Second, he was going back to the graveyard.  
  
Third, he was going to find the thing that infected Dean and send its ass straight back to hell.   
  
Then he would hope that Dean actually did want him. Sam sighed, he should have known better. He had controlled himself before, why now was it so difficult?  
  
Because Dean had responded finally.  
  
TBC 


	6. Chapter 6 He said, "Yeah"

CHAPTER SIX  
  
There was one place Sam could go to get information he needed for some kind of incite on what was happening. Lindsay Spaulding’s tea house was still open. He didn’t have time for random researching and hoped he could charm her into answering questions, he certainly didn’t want to go to the cemetery unprepared and was rather pissed that Dean had taken the Impala.  
  
It was fairly easy to get to the tea house, it was a little busy but not crowded and he was able to get a nice seat inside. One of the waitresses was ready to serve him almost immediately.  
  
“You don’t look so good, sugar, what can I get you?” She inquired. She was a voluptuous, large brunette with a wide friendly smile. It was a relief to see a friendly smile.  
  
“A sandwich and one of your specialty teas would be great. Could you make it something with a lot of caffeine?” Sam smiled at her as she wrote down his order. He frowned as he heard the sound of a familiar engine outside. The Impala had just pulled up. Sam tensed immediately when he saw Dean get out of the car.  
  
“I’ll get your order Sweetie.” She hurried off to the kitchen.  
  
Sam tried very hard to hide in his booth; he wasn’t ready to face Dean yet. Dean didn’t actually come into the tea house he was heading across the street to some kind of shop. It looked like a hardware shop. He pulled the curtain forward a little, anxiously. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know what Dean was in a hardware store –for-. If only he could disappear into the booth so that when Dean came back out he wouldn’t see him.  
  
He had never had any reason to fear Dean in the past, but this thing that had infected him, Sam was afraid of it. He also didn’t know what he was going to do when Dean was back to normal. He’d just had the greatest blow job in his life. He… God. He wanted Dean to… Sam ran a shaky hand through his hair. Dean’s lips, his tongue, he couldn’t get Dean out of his mind.  
  
“Here’s your tea, Sugar, are you alright? You look a little pale.” She put the cup down.  
  
“Hey, thanks. I’m ok.” Sam flashed her a bright smile. “Listen, I’m actually looking to talk to Mrs Spaulding?”  
  
The waitress’ face fell slightly, “Sorry, Sugar. Lindsay Spaulding is not receiving visitors. I will be happy to answer any questions you have though.” She sat across the booth from Sam with wide enthusiastic eyes. “I’m something of a median myself.”  
  
“Uh-huh. Ok.” Sam grinned, trying to hide his disappointment. He’d really hoped he would be able to talk to Lindsay. He glanced at the waitress’s nametag. “Maureen.” He let the name roll off his tongue. “What can you tell me about the ghosts at Vale End? Has it always been this active?”  
  
“Not always.” Maureen replied. “It has fits and starts.” She lowered her voice. “It’s not just Vale End, Sugar. It’s this whole area and all the towns in it. Vale End is the key though. I can always tell when I go there. Sometimes the ghosts are at peace, but then they get restless and when they get restless…they get mean or they get desperate.”  
  
“What triggers it?” Sam sipped his tea; it really was good for tea.  
  
“People usually. In this case, I think it’s something different. I felt a bad vibe several months ago and it’s been bad ever since. You’re not thinking of going there tonight are you?” Maureen lifted a brow.  
  
“Actually, yes.” Sam looked a bit sheepish. “But I’m gonna have to walk, my brother took the car.”  
  
“I’ll be happy to drive you; it’s on the way to my house.”  
  
Sam looked up to see Dean put something in the trunk of the Impala. Dean looked over and their eyes met. Sam shrank into the booth causing Maureen’s eyebrows to rise. “Just tell me when he’s gone.” Sam whispered.  
  
“I wish I could, Sugar, but he’s on his way in here.”  
  
“You’d better leave my booth and head into the kitchen.” Sam suggested softly. “I’ll meet up with you later. What time are you off?”  
  
“8pm.”  
  
“Perfect.”  
  
He sighed as Dean entered the Tea House just as Maureen headed into the kitchen. His brother found his booth pretty easily and sat opposite. The red eyes were gone, but there was a simmering heat to Dean as he looked at Sam. “You’re not at the motel.”  
  
“I was hungry.” Sam murmured, as he lowered his eyes.  
  
“So you came to a tea house.” Dean smirked. “I can’t stay. I’ve got things to do.” He rose from the booth and stepped closer to Sam. Dean ignored the whole teahouse and snatched Sam by the shirt. He pulled him up slightly and kissed him. It was a surprisingly soft kiss compared to the last one. He left Sam breathless, their foreheads touching. “Just remember I’m coming back for you.” He whispered heatedly.  
  
Maureen was just in time to see the kiss as Dean let Sam go and headed out of the restaurant. She watched Dean leave before she brought Sam’s sandwich over. “I thought as much.” She told Sam cheerfully.  
  
“Huh?”  
  
“You weren’t staring at my breasts.” Maureen winked. “He’s hot. Is he your boyfriend?”  
  
Sam coughed and reddened. “Uhm …uhh…” It was his turn to stammer.  
  
“Oh my God.” Realization dawned and Maureen gave him a truly sympathetic look. “Now I know why you’re so interested in Vale End. It changes people. That was your brother, wasn’t he? And that’s some car.”  
  
The Impala thundered out of the parking lot, it never ceased to amaze him how quickly they could get out of town with how loud the car was. He looked down at the table. “Yeah.”  
  
“No wonder you’re so upset.” Maureen said softly. “Listen, Sugar. It’s happened to a lot of people in the area over the centuries. They just change and lose all their inhibitions. They do exactly what they want to do, right or wrong. I don’t know why, but some last longer than others. I hate to be the one to tell you this, but your brother kissed you just now because he wanted to, not because something was controlling him.”  
  
Sam wasn’t sure how to take that news. Maureen wisely left him alone for a while. If Dean had kissed him and done that … amazing thing with his mouth, he’d wanted to. Sam couldn’t stop a smile that tugged on his lips. Dean wanted him. After all this time, Dean really –wanted- him. It was a relief of sorts, but also scary as all hell. Dean wanted him and he wanted Dean. Sam smiled again and reached for his sandwich. Suddenly, he was extremely hungry. Knowing what he knew now made all the difference in the world because if Dean wanted him, there was a chance for them. There was a chance that he could have what he’d dreamed of for so long. If only he could save Dean.  
  
Something Maureen said was dancing in his brain. This had all gotten worse a few months ago, probably right around when they set loose the demons. Demons he could deal with. He was all over that. The Demon may not be Dean, but he’d find it. He suddenly grinned.   
  
If the demon wasn't Dean, he really wanted him.   
  
He'd get his brother back..  
  
TBC 


	7. Grown Up Wrong

CHAPTER SEVEN  
  
Later that evening, Sam had met up with Maureen and they were driving to the cemetery. He explained a little bit about what happened to her.  
  
“So that’s when your brother started acting strange?” Maureen considered Sam’s words as they drove. “He was slapped?”  
  
“Yes.” Sam swallowed.  
  
“Okay, Sugar. So tell me about your brother. What’s he like?”  
  
“Why do you want to know?” Sam glanced at her. In the back of his head he was thinking. God, she’s got REM playing, Dean would have a conniption fit if he tried to play REM in the Impala and It’s the End Of The World As We Know It was one of his favorite songs. “Dean is uhm. Well, he’s usually very direct.”  
  
“Direct how? Does he hold back a lot?”  
  
“He saves people, that’s his entire goal in life and now…” Sam sighs.  
  
“Now, what, Sugar?”  
  
“He’s not got that much longer to live, less than a year.” Sam couldn’t hold the emotion out of his voice.  
  
“Then he’s angry? Maybe that’s what it is feeding off of. His anger.”  
  
“That’s just it, he’s not angry. He’s accepted it, he keeps telling me he’s ready.”  
  
“There are different kinds of anger, sweetie.” Maureen explained softly. “Sounds like a kind of inner rage at the injustice. I know something about spirits and I’m not so sure you should be going to the cemetery tonight. I’m worried, Sam.”  
  
“Dean is also very stubborn.” Sam smiled as he looked out his car window. It was weird to be driving in a car with someone other than Dean. “He doesn’t think twice about jumping into harms way to save someone he doesn’t even know. He’s put himself at risk so many times hell when I was at school half the time I didn’t know if he was alive or dead.”  
  
“Is he some kind of search and rescue coastguard type?” Maureen wondered.  
  
Sam laughed. “No uh. Nothing like that. Look you’re going to think this is crazy but we um. We came here to see if we could stop what was happening here. It’s kind of our job. The family business.” He didn’t know why he was telling Maureen this, she just seemed to be the type of person who wouldn’t take it the wrong way.  
  
Maureen was quiet for a little while.  "By any chance do you know a guy named John Winchester?”  
  
Sam coughed loudly. “You knew him?”  
  
“You could say that.” Maureen had the grace to look slightly flustered. “Let’s just say John was here for a couple of weeks about 3 years ago and then just took off. I always wondered if there were more out there like him. Now I know. He never talked about his past but you just said exactly what he told me 3 years ago. He’d come to see if he could stop what was happening here.”  
  
Sam was wide eyed, Maureen was full of surprises. “He really was here for that long? It’s not mentioned at all in his journal. What did he do here? Do you know?”  
  
“Well Sugar.” Maureen gave a smile. “I can tell you one thing; he wasn’t here just for the family business.”  
  
It dawned on Sam finally what Maureen was telling him. She and his father, he stared at her, and tried hard not to sound aghast. . “Oh… “  
  
“Don’t worry, Sam. We parted on good terms. I knew he was just passin’ through. Such a charming man, we had fun and that was it.”  
  
“My dad was charming? In what universe?” Sam could only continue to stare at her, incredulous.  
  
“I have some pictures at my house. I’ll bring them to the tea house tomorrow. Oh and here we are. It never ceases to amaze me, I’ve been coming to this cemetery since I was little and I’m never quite comfortable here at any time of day or night. Are you sure you don’t want me to wait for you?”  
  
Sam saw that the Impala was parked in the parking lot near the entrance. “No, I’m good. I need to confront my brother on my own. I don’t want you to get hurt.”   
  
"Be careful Sam." Maureen ssaid softly.  
  
“He won’t hurt me.” Sam promised her. “Thanks Maureen. I’ll look you up tomorrow; I’d love to see those pictures and hear more about my Dad.”  
  
“Sam, wait a minute.” Maureen told him. She fished in her pocket. “Take this.” It was a few leaves and crushed flower petals wrapped in a small bag.  
  
“What is it?”  
  
“It will protect you when you need it. Sam. just, be careful.”  
  
“I will.” Sam pocketed the strange bag and watched her drive away. He hefted his own backpack and looked over at the Impala.  
  
He walked past his brother’s car knowing instinctively that Dean wasn’t inside. He made his way through the tomb stones to Mary Ritter’s grave and stood by it for a little while. He was going to dig her up and salt and burn. This time, no one appeared, though he could hear something all around him, a constant rustle. He knew this was the heart of the matter and he waited, his gun filled with rock salt. Where the hell was Dean?  
  
“Don’t bother.” Dean’s voice suddenly came from behind him.  
  
“Huh?”  
  
“She’s already been salted and burned I’d say five or six times at least.” Dean toed the soil. “Look. It doesn’t seem to have any effect. I did find something out though.”  
  
“What?”  
  
“The Spaulding’s have a mausoleum. I think I found something of hers in there. We’ll need to get rid of it too. Come on.” Dean turned and walked casually away.  
  
“Dean?” Sam stared after his brother, confusion clear.  
  
“What?”  
  
“Aren’t you mad at me?”  
  
“Should I be?”  
  
Sam lowered his gun, “I guess…ok. Let’s go.” He wasn’t –stupid-, warning bells were gong off in his head. He had a feeling he was being led into some kind of trap and he kept his finger on the trigger.  
  
Dean seemed almost normal as he led his brother through the cemetery as though he had been there a million times. “It’s just over there by the forest. See, a lot of tombs were built over there a while ago. Lots of rich families, wanted to keep their skeletons I guess. When I die, you’d better burn me, Sammy and scatter the ashes. I don’t want you keeping me in some freakin’ urn. I mean, gross.”  
  
“Don’t talk like that, alright.” Sam muttered.  
  
Dean just rolled his eyes. “In here.”  
  
He indicated the mausoleum. It was a huge monstrosity with angels and gargoyles and obviously cost a lot of money in its day. When Sam took his eyes off of Dean he didn’t even see his brother pull the gun with the silencer. Dean fired the tranquilizer instantly and smiled when he saw the shock in Sam’s eyes.  
  
“You just can’t help yourself, can you?” Dean shook his head as he caught Sam before his brother fell to the ground. “Good thing because it makes this a whole lot easier to do. It would have been messy if I’d have had to carry you out of the motel.”  
  
“Dean??” Sam whimpered as he was hauled inside the Mausoleum.  
  
Sam fought to keep awake as he was dragged through the dusty floor. Dean pulled open what looked like a door to a level below and hauled him down a flight of stairs. The place was lit entirely with candles and torches and candles. There were three stone slabs. Two had dusty skeletons with cobwebs and shrouds and the other was free except that there were chains drilled into it.  
  
He was barely conscious when Dean stripped him and shackled him to the slab.  
  
“I’ve always wanted to do this.” Dean said with a little laugh. “I’ve wanted to see how far I could go with you. But don’t worry, Sammy. I’m not going to take you.” He let his eyes roam over Sam’s body stretched out over the slab. “You look absolutely gorgeous.”  
  
Dean was just trying to scare him. Sam took several very deep breaths. That had to be it. Dear God, Dean would do anything he wanted without any morals, that’s what Maureen had said. He was still Dean though; he wouldn’t –hurt- him. Would he?  
  
“Dean, please listen to me.” Sam rasped, “Something’s got a hold over you. You don’t want to do this. I mean, you want to, but this is just fantasy, Dean. It’s not real. Its making you act on your fantasies and desires.”  
  
“If that was true, Sammy I’d be fucking you right now.” Dean said casually. “But I’m not.”  
  
“Because you can’t hurt me, Dean, please… this isn’t you.”  
  
“Actually all I wanted to do was get a picture of you like this.” Dean grinned. He held up his cell phone and started to take some pictures at different angles. “I figured I’m going to hell anyway so.”  
  
Sam stared at him in shock and frustrated anger as the tranqs effects wore off.  
  
TBC 


	8. Pain in My Heart

Chapter Eight  
  
“Dean, let me out of these, I feel ridiculous.” Sam ordered.  
  
“You look hot.” Dean put away his cell phone finally. “In fact, I bet I could make a lot of money with these photos.”  
  
“You wouldn’t dare…” Sam stared at him, outraged.  
  
“It’d make one hell of a porn video.” Dean wiggled his eyebrows. “Oh for Christ sake Sammy, stop being such a wet blanket. Of course I’m going to let you go. This was just for fun.”  
  
“Fun…” Sam continued to stare at him.  
  
“Yeah, you know, fun.”  
  
“I’m going to kill you!” Sam struggled in his chains.  
  
“Maybe I should keep those on.” Dean considered as he watched his brother fume. “Look, I’ve been holding back a lot of things, Sam. Now I can do whatever I want.”  
  
“And not care who you hurt in the process?” Sam gave up trying to get out of the shackles. Dean was too good at this.  
  
“Not really.” Dean shrugged. “Besides, you had fun too.”  
  
“What? Of course I didn’t.” Sam was outraged.  
  
“Admit it, part of you was expecting me to fuck you and you would have loved it too.” Dean unlocked one of the shackles and ducked a punch. His own hand whipped out and grabbed Sam’s wrist before he could try and hit him again. Dean smiled at his brother’s anger. Sam was always beautiful when he was angry.  
  
“Or is it that you want to fuck me?” Dean wondered softly. “Eh, Sammy? Right here, over this slab of cold stone?” He unshackled another wrist. “I wouldn’t let you before, but now. Now I just might. I know what you want, Sam. I can feel it and I can see it. I know you want me to bend over right now so you can take revenge.”  
  
Sam could only breathe in short soft gasps. He certainly wasn’t going to let Dean know the truth, and the truth was, he was right. Sam had thought about it. He let his hands fall to the stone and his fists clenched as Dean unlocked his legs. He got to his feet, shaky and uncertain. Dean was still fully clothed but that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to try anything.  
  
“How much time have we really got left to do what we want to do Sam? I’m going to hell anyway, Sam. So what’s the point of arguing morality?”  
  
“Because what you want right now isn’t what you would do Dean.” Sam sighed. He had to admit, the idea of giving in and just letting it happen was appealing. “I want you, I do. But not like this. It’s Dean I want, my brother Dean, the only person I will ever truly love. You look like Dean and you act like Dean sometimes, but you’re not Dean. I don’t know who you are. You’re not possessed, but you’re also not Dean. I know someone who can help, her name is Maureen. I met her at the tea house. She knew Dad. Dean, please…” Sam put a hand on his brother’s shirt and bunched his fingers into it desperately. “We have to stop this from affecting you. I need my brother back.”  
  
“And I need you, Sammy.” Dean whispered. He closed the distance between them effortlessly and claimed Sam’s lips. Dean’s hands roamed his naked body, sliding over every muscle, every curve. Sam might be tall but Dean was filled with an inner force that made up for any advantage Sam would have had. His tongue slid past Sam’s defenses and worked deep into his mouth. “Tell me you want me.”  
  
“Dean…” Sam fought the need. He knew it was wrong, he’d succeeded once earlier that day but twice? He was done for. “Yes.” He finally conceded. “God…yes.” He slipped his hand down so he could unbuckle his brother’s belt. “Yes, I want you.”  
  
“Even though I’m not really Dean?” Dean’s eyes became red and Sam’s hand froze. He moved to back away, but strong arms kept him in a vice grip.  
  
“What are you?” Sam panted.  
  
“I’m Dean. I’m your brother’s true self, Sammy. The one who’s wanted to fuck you since you turned twelve had had your first hard-on. I’m the one he hides from the world. I’m his pain and his needs. I’m what Dean really wants. I’m what he dreams about and what he fears. I’m his darkness and his despair. If you want Dean, you can’t have just the bits that please you.” Dean pressed Sam back against the stone.  
  
“Dean, please.” Sam begged.  
  
Dean nipped Sam’s skin. “Do you want me to stop?” He ran his tongue up the side of his brother’s neck and suckled his earlobe.  
  
There was only so many times he could deny what he wanted. Was it so wrong if this was what Dean really wanted? Maybe if he just gave in to it? Maybe if he just went along with it? At least it would keep Dean near him and he could stop his brother from hurting anyone else. Sam closed his eyes and wordlessly unhooked the top button of his brother’s jeans. The action was loud enough and Dean gave a soft growl of victory. “You won’t regret it.”  
  
I already do. Sam shut down the thinking side of his mind.  
  
*  
  
His first time with Dean should have been something more than this. He shouldn’t smell dirt on his fingers, and he shouldn’t be grasping the edge of a stone slab in a room where the décor was death. He should be facing his brother, his legs wrapped around him and kissing him desperately. This was lust not passion; this was sex and not love. Sam didn’t have much time to think about what should have been because Dean was already inside him. Yeah, he’d been prepared, but hell it hurt more than Sam remembered.  
  
In spite of the fact that it was just sex, Dean made it good. Dean worshiped his body and turned every point to fire. Sam was dizzy and had already come once before his brother started to fuck him. He gripped the edge of the slab, and his fingers bled from the sharp stone that flaked off it. His muscles bulged from the strain. Dean’s head was buried into the back of his neck, and his hand was wrapped around his cock, protecting it from the stone. Even as far gone as his brother was, he still managed to protect Sam somehow.  
  
His first time with Dean should have been special, and maybe not. Maybe this was what he deserved. Dean was the good one, always jumping in to save people. Sam hadn’t wanted this life, hadn’t wanted to chase after supernatural creatures and help people. Maybe this is all that he would ever get. Sam panted and groaned when his prostrate was teased. He was going to come again and he would see more than stars.  
  
In his first time with Dean he felt heaven touch him. It was a cruel unnatural joke orchestrated to make him want what he’d never have again. Bad, good or lost, he loved Dean and even now when it wasn’t about love he knew he’d say yes again in a second.  
  
Dean came inside him and it sent a jolt through his body.  
  
Heaven slipped away and Sam felt numb with self loathing.  
  
“You truly belong to me now, Sam.” Dean whispered.  
  
“Yes.” Sam whispered. “I do.”  
  
*  
When Maureen went home, she walked upstairs to her old dresser. It had been in the family for several centuries. She unlocked one of the drawers and brought out a small box. Inside was a vial with red liquid and a syringe.  
  
“I know, John. I’ll help him.” She said to the air about her. “I can handle Dean. I handled you didn’t I?”  
  
Grimly, Maureen recalled the time she’d had to stick the syringe in John during sex. It had been the only way to stop him once he’d become infected. It was the only way to get close to him. Most of the time, she was too late to get to the people who were infected. She was the granddaughter of a witch and this was all she had to fight the demon at Vale End with.  
  
She walked back downstairs and smiled at the pair of boots still resting by her front door. She’d never removed them. “Don’t worry, Sugar.”  
  
Maybe John wasn’t around, but it made her feel better to talk to him. He’d left his mark on her family and helped her when no other man could have. Yes, she knew they were John’s sons, just as she knew about Mary and the demon. John had not come to Vale End for the demon, he’d come for the Spaulding Family. Unfortunately for John the demon had infected him and Maureen had made a potion to cure him. Her grandmother had not been pleased. When the Witch and Demon had decided to kill Maureen as a sacrifice, John had rescued her. John had also dug up Mary Ritter’s grave and salted and burned her a long time ago. Unfortunately, they’d never been able to kill the demon. Maureen had kept the syringe knowing one day the Vale End demon would act up again and that even though the Spaulding Witches had been dealt with, it was still there.  
  
TBC 


	9. I'm Alright

 CHAPTER NINE

Sam curled into Dean’s arms and listened to his beating heart. He had stopped caring that they were not anywhere one should be cuddling. He just didn’t want to think about it. He closed his eyes and pretended that he and Dean were in their bed in a pale green house with a white picket fence. It was by a lake on the outskirts of town somewhere no one knew who they were. There was no pain and no humiliation there was just him and Dean and Dean loved him enough to settle down and live out his life.

He would give anything to have that dream come true. Instead, his first time with his brother had been sharp and cruel as much as it had been good. He didn’t know what to feel or what to think. Not thinking at all seemed like a good plan. If he thought even a little he’d know how wrong this was. God, how wrong EVERYTHING was. He’d let Dean fuck him knowing it wasn’t really –his- Dean, his brother. He was a miserable failure as a brother. A real man would have stood up to it. Even with his eyes closed he could hear the demon laughing at him in the darkness. The spirits in the graveyard were disgusted. They had warned him and he had come back anyway. Deep down, he didn’t care how he had Dean as long as he did and that scared him more than Dean being upset.

“You ok, Sam?” Dean asked after a while.

Why was he even asking? Sam swallowed. “I’m fine.” His voice was soft. “I just need my clothes now.”

Dean pulled away from Sam who just stared at his hands. He retrieved Sam’s clothes and bag. “Here.” He started to put on his own clothing. “Well, that was fun.” He grinned shamelessly. “I think I’ll make a list of places I want to do that in.” He stretched.

The callous tone of voice nearly broke him. Dean would never have treated him like this. “Whatever you want, Dean,” Sam found himself replying.

“That’s true.” Dean zipped and buttoned his jeans. He turned around to look at his brother. “Glad you finally accepted it.”

It hurt to put on his jeans. He wanted badly to have a nice hot shower and to just curl up and read something to get his mind off of the physical and mental pain.

“What are we doing now?” Sam asked his brother.

“I don’t know, Go back to the motel, grab a beer; maybe I’ll fuck you again. This place is starting to bore me.” Dean considered.

Sam fingered the pouch that Maureen gave him. Right now, he wasn’t sure that it was such a good idea to go anywhere with Dean. What could he do now? If he left Dean something might happen to an innocent and he couldn’t allow that. If he went with Dean, he’d never recover. If he didn’t go with Dean, he’d never forgive himself. He pulled out the pouch and stared at the flower leaves that began to crumble into dust in his hand.

He felt the dust sprinkle on his fingers and he blinked several times as it rose in a quick cloud and dissipated all before Dean turned around. “What’s the matter Sam?”

Sam stared at Dean and he swallowed nervously. Dean had seriously changed. There was nothing of his brother’s appearance in the monster that faced him now. His eyes were red and his skin leathery and withered. His teeth…his teeth were sharp, like fangs. Every vein in his face was pronounced and ugly black. Sam fought the need to recoil as he didn’t want Dean to notice that anything was wrong. What the hell was in that bag Maureen had given him? He wasn’t even remotely attracted to the thing that was standing before him and for a few moments he had a hard time understanding why until he realized finally it really wasn’t Dean. It wasn’t the man he loved and that’s what the dust was doing. It was a freedom from the control that Dean held over his body and an escape from looking into his eyes and dying for his touch.

“What is it?” Dean eyed Sam. “What’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing,” Sam swallowed. He pushed the bag back into his pocket. “Let’s get out of here, a beer sounds like a good idea.”

Dean smirked as they walked out of the Mausoleum. He noticed Sam was looking straight ahead most of the time as they headed to the Impala. “You’re not going to act like an outraged virgin all night are you? Because that would really put a downer on the evening. Besides, you weren’t.”

Sam shook his head, “No, sorry.” He smiled. Ok. He just had to get a grip. Yes, Dean wanted him, really wanted him. Yes, he knew Dean wanted him while he was still in control. That didn’t make it better, that just made it easier. It was ok. What happened in the Mausoleum was ok. He just had to accept that. “Ok, I’m still ticked off about the pictures, but everything else is cool.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Don’t worry, as much as I love having porn pictures of you, no one else is allowed to see them.” He tossed Sam’s bag in the back of the Impala. “So, how did you get here anyway, you mentioned some chick. Was she that waitress with the really big … “ Dean grinned and emphasized his words with his hands.

“Maureen, and jeaze Dean do you have to be so crude? Yeah she brought me here.”

“You said we should see her, she knew Dad?”

“Yeah. She has a house nearby here so she gave me a lift. I’ve got her address. Dean, we should find her and talk to her.”

“Sure, after we go grab a beer and you get cleaned up a bit, you look like crap, and your hands are all dirty.”

*

It was weird. Sam decided, If he wasn’t able to see the reality that was the demon’s influence over his brother he’d be completely fooled that Dean was back to normal.

Dean had taken them back to the motel and acted completely normal. He even waited for Sam to take a nice hot shower and scrub himself down. Dean hadn’t even tried to touch him or cajole him or be mean in any way. He’d even put ointment on Sam’s cuts from the stone.  
“You ready to go out now?” Dean asked Sam after watching him put on a fresh shirt.

“Yeah, I’m good. Thanks.” He said. “I could really use a beer.”

Dean reached out and grabbed Sam’s wrist as his brother walked past him. He pulled him into his lap and held him there and just sniffed in his scent. “You smell good.” He rumbled. “I’m sorry about earlier Sammy. I was just having a little fun. I’ll make it up to you later, ok?” He placed a gentle kiss on the back of Sam’s neck.

Sam fought the urge to shudder. He forced a grin. “It’s ok, Dean. Really, Come on, lets get out of here.”

Dean nodded and released him much to Sam’s relief.

*

The bar unfortunately wasn’t as much of a relief as Sam thought. It was not just Dean infected in this town. He saw several people there with similar characteristics that his brother had. The annoying part was that Dean was hitting on women and as much as Sam didn’t want to admit it, he was jealous. He drank his beer and tried not to watch.

“Hey, Sam.” Maureen’s voice came from behind him. “I’m glad to see that you’re ok.”

“Hey, Maureen” Sam smiled, though it didn’t reach his eyes. “You came back into town tonight?”

“Yeah, what’s a girl going to do, sit at home all night alone talking to herself?” Maureen chuckled. “I saw your car parked outside here and I figured at least Dean would be here. Is he?”

“Yeah he’s over there.”

“Did you use the pouch?”

“Yes.” Sam nodded and looked down. “I see it now.”

“You’ve only got one chance to help Dean.” Maureen said softly. “Give him this.” She pressed the full syringe into Sam’s hand. “When he passes out, take him as far away from here as possible.”

“is that what you did for my Dad?”

Maureen nodded. “It’s the only way to loosen the hold of the Vale Demon. It’s the only way to get your brother back. I had to do it to John and drive him far away.”

“I wish we could have talked more.” Sam said softly. “I would have liked to see those pictures.”

“Just know that John saved my life, ok?”

“Why don’t you leave, Maureen? Why do you stay here?” Sam asked her as he pocketed the syringe.

“It’s my home. It’s not like this all the time.” Maureen smiled wistfully.

“Thank you.” Sam sincerely hoped that things would work out for her.

Dean eventually wandered back to the pair of them. “Maureen, right? Sam tells me you knew our Dad.”

She nodded, “A fascinating man. He solved a problem for me while he was here.”

“I saw the grave. That’s Dad for you.” Dean stepped close to Sam and hooked his fingers in the back pocket of Sam’s jeans. “So he didn’t get the demon. That’s not like Dad to leave unfinished business unless he had a really good reason.”

“Dean, can we go back to the motel?” Sam asked his brother quickly.

“No, he did what he came here to do.” Maureen said softly. “Sometimes you can’t kill all the bad things out there, Dean.”

“I think that’s because you took him out of here, isn’t it?” Dean said with a growl. “You did something to my father, bitch.” He stepped closer to Maureen. “Is it because you’re protecting Vale’s End like every member of your family has done all these years?”

“Dean, shut up. She’s trying to help-“

“Sammy, you’re so fucking naïve. If you had been paying attention you would have done the research too. This woman is the last of the Spaulding witches since Dad killed her grandmother and they’re all protecting it.” He snorted. “I don’t care what you do to me, I’m going to hell anyway but if you hurt Sam I’ll make sure you get there before I do.” Dean snarled.

“I’m not trying to hurt you or your brother.” Maureen said quietly. “I’m trying to help you.”

“Sam, lets go.” Dean ordered. “Don’t come near us again.” He told Maureen.

Dean turned and stalked out of the bar. Sam gave her an apologetic look and followed his brother. On the way back to the motel, Dean said nothing the entire time. It was just as well.

Sam didn’t waste any time; as soon as Dean’s back was turned he pulled out the syringe and stuck it into his neck. Surprise was his only course of action and he didn’t want to take the chance that Dean would try something else.

*

They were two hundred miles away from Nashua when his brother’s face relaxed. Sam breathed a sigh of relief and just drove. He didn’t care where he went he just had to get Dean far away from Vale End. He’d worry about what was going to happen when Dean woke up when he woke up.  
TBC 

 


	10. That's How Strong My Love Is

CHAPTER TEN  
  
Sam had been driving since they left Nashua, he didn’t know how long they had been on the road he’d been so concentrated on getting to Bobby’s he hadn’t thought of anything other than to stop and get gas.  
  
Dean was asleep for most of it, once or twice he’d groggily come to and then almost immediately he was out cold again. This last time he’d stayed awake for about two minutes, long enough to give Sam a confused and angry look, then pass out again.  
  
The last time they’d stopped, Sam had been sure to get a travel mug of coffee and some of Dean’s favorite snacks. Hell, he’d even gone so far as to have Dean’s music on. Anything to appease his brother when he did finally wake up.  
  
Sam’s fingers gripped the wheel. The sun was setting again. He was tired and in pain. He really hadn’t recovered from the cemetery incident and driving all day really wasn’t helping. He stopped at a drive through to get something to eat and when he got back Dean was drinking his coffee and in the driver’s seat waiting for him.  
  
Before he could say anything Dean just snapped. “Sit and eat.”  
  
“Dean.” Sam reached out to him and sighed when Dean recoiled.  
  
“Don’t.” Dean told Sam gruffly. “Just let me process. I’ll drive, where were we going?”  
  
“Bobby’s” Sam’s said faintly. “Are you…um…”  
  
“Me? Yes.” Dean turned on the ignition and they headed out again.  
  
“Do you..um…”  
  
“Remember everything? Yes.” Dean nodded. “It’s not like I could forget, I checked my phone to make sure I hadn’t dreamed the whole thing.”  
  
Sam sighed. “I’m sorry.”  
  
“You aren’t the one who should be sorry, Sammy.” Dean kept his eyes firmly on the road.  
  
“It’s ok.” Sam had lost his appetite. He pushed the bag away.  
  
“Don’t do that.” Dean snarled. “Don’t you do that, don’t you blame yourself for my screw up. Don’t you dare!”  
  
“Dean…” Sam said helplessly. “I…”  
  
“It should not have happened, and you know it.”  
  
“But it did, Dean.” Sam said imploringly.  
  
“Not now, Sam. I don’t want to discuss this now.” Dean shook his head. “Like I said, let me process, please.”  
  
Let him process. Sam rested his head against the Impala’s window. God those words hurt so much. He didn’t dare sleep, he couldn’t. Not like this, not with Dean this upset. It was harder than he imagined it would be. The silence was killing him. He wondered what Dean was going to do. Would he leave him at Bobby’s, never speak to him again? Would things ever be the same?  
  
He looked at Dean in the window’s reflection. His brother’s strong jaw was jutted out in determination. He knew that the wheels were turning in Dean’s brain. Dean was trying to find a way out of this, a way to say it never happened. The problem was it was impossible to say it never happened. It did and they both would remember for a long time. Forty minutes passed without conversation. He kept drifting off to sleep and forcing himself to wake up again.  
  
“Dean?” Sam finally whispered.  
  
“What?” Dean glanced at him.  
  
“You know I…” He began then stopped immediately when he received a warning look from Dean.  
  
“I need a doctor to look at you Sam. When we get to Bobby’s we’ll have him bring someone over, ok?” The tone of voice made it clear there was no room for argument.  
  
“Alright,” Sam nodded. “But I…”  
  
“Sam, no fucking arguments about this, I barely prepared you.”  
  
Sam looked down at his hands. It wasn’t physical hurt.  
  
“I’d like to go away for a while, but I can’t.” Dean then said causing Sam’s head to snap back up. “I’ve only got so much time and in spite of this shit, you’re the only one I want to spend it with, ok?”  
  
Sam swallowed, “Ok. Dean, don’t leave. Please.”  
  
‘I’m not going to leave.” Dean said. “But this… thing. This isn’t how I want you to remember me, Sam. If I could take back what happened the last few days. Oh, man.” He looked back at the road. “You got the worst of me, and you’re the last person in the world who deserved that. I just want to know that you’re ok physically. Then we’ll talk, ok?”  
  
“You promise?” This time when Sam reached over, Dean didn’t recoil. He let Sam take his hand and link their fingers together.  
  
“Yeah,” Dean nodded. He shifted back. “Come here, do we still have food in that bag?”  
  
Sam nodded it took him a minute to realize that Dean was giving him an option of snuggling up. He smiled and did exactly that, adjusting his seatbelt slightly. He picked up the bag and pulled out the French fries first. “We can share.” He told Dean softly. They were cold, but he didn’t care.  
  
He dipped his fingers into the container and proceeded to feed himself and his brother, Sam smiled when Dean’s tongue was a little familiar and lingered on his fingers. He sighed. Things would work out if they could do this.  
  
“Sam.” Dean said softly after they finished the meal.  
  
“What?”  
  
“I’ll make it up to you.”  
  
“You just did, Dean.” Sam gave him a tender smile.  
  
Dean snorted. “God, you –would- think sharing food is romantic.” He rolled his eyes.  
  
It was so nice to hear his brother grousing normally Sam just snickered and remained where he was. Sure, things weren’t solved and he wasn’t sure exactly how Dean felt yet but his brother wasn’t pushing him away completely. This meant that they just might get past this if everything went well. He refused to think of what would happen if they didn’t. He didn’t have time for that.  
  
He was grateful at least that Dean recognized that. As much pain as this job cost them they only had so much time together. But not if Sam could help it, “Do you love me, Dean?” Sam asked softly.  
  
Dean sighed. “What part of I don’t want to talk about this yet, didn’t you understand, Sam? I can’t make any decisions right now.”  
  
“I love you.” Sam blurted out. “I mean, really love you Dean and not in just a brotherly way. I think, I hope you know that.”  
  
“I know you do.” Dean nodded. “Change the tape, we’ll be at Bobby’s in a couple of hours, and you should sleep.”  
  
“Dean…”  
  
“Jeasus Sammy.” Dean slammed on the breaks of the Impala, good thing they were the only one’s on the road. He pulled the car off to the side and parked it. “What the fuck more do you want, huh? Haven’t I shown you enough? I couldn’t live without you. I’m willing to spend eternity in hell for you. Of course I fucking love you, Sam, when you’re not driving me crazy like right now. And no not in a brotherly way, you are the only person I’ve ever loved and ever will love. You got that?”  
  
Sam nodded in shock as he stared into his brother’s passionate eyes. “I got it.”  
  
“Now let me drive in fucking peace.”  
  
Dean turned the car back on and drove.  
TBC 


	11. Look What You've Done

CHAPTER ELEVEN  
  
When the two of them finally made it to Bobby’s he really wasn’t surprised to see them, even at the hour of night they arrived.  
  
“Yeah, I can get a doctor here.” Bobby nodded. “You boys had a hell of a time in Vale End, I take it?” He looked from Sam to Dean and wasn’t sure which one of them looked worse emotionally.  
  
“Yeah,” Dean grabbed a beer even though they had shown up at Bobby’s at 2:30 in the morning. When Sam went to their old bedroom to put away his bag Dean turned to Bobby. “I want Sam checked thoroughly, Bobby. And they guy needs to be gentle, ok? Sam’s been through a lot.”  
  
“Dean,” Bobby turned him around. “You remind me of someone right now and you look like you have one hell of a hangover, so I’d put the beer down right now.”  
  
“Yeah, who?”  
  
“Your father the last time he visited New Hampshire.” Bobby said. “Met a girl who fucked him up pretty good, she cut him loose though. We still don’t know why to this day. I told you boys to get the hell out of there, but you didn’t take my advice did you?”  
  
“Her name wouldn’t have been Maureen Spaulding would it?” Dean ignored Bobby’s words and took another swig.  
  
“Yeah, Heiress to some pretty dark powers there. So you did meet up with her. Well, she let you go too. Maybe she has a soft spot for Winchesters.” Bobby shrugged.  
  
“Sammy charmed her, I didn’t.” Dean said. “She told him Dad saved her, she made some kind of potion that set me free. Now, about that doctor?”  
  
“Witches play by their own rules. Never met a witch I didn’t want to burn.” Bobby sat down across from Dean. “I’ll get the doctor here tomorrow, but what about you? You look like shit, Dean. It took me months to shake John out of the crap they did to him there. You don’t have months.”  
  
“I know, Damnit, I know,” Dean snarled, his voice as low as he could make it so his brother couldn’t hear. “Bobby, I hurt him. I hurt Sammy. I hurt him… “ Dean fought to keep his composure. “Not just physically. Bobby. I don’t know how to say it.” His shoulders trembled slightly. “I love him so much and I really screwed things up this time.”  
He prayed Bobby would understand.  
  
It was Bobby’s turn to get a beer. “How badly did you hurt him? What did you do, Dean?” His face was unreadable and Dean was afraid.  
  
“I…” Dean sighed. “I fucked him.” There was no sugar coated way to put it.  
  
“Ah” Bobby said, his voice a deadly calm. “Did you rape Sam, Dean?” The sentence was basically the same as saying. “Do I have to send you to hell now?”

  
“No, not exactly, I don’t know.”  
  
“I can't say I'm not surprised. What do mean by not exactly?” Bobby’s voice was calm, though it looked like he might have just aged ten years emotionally.   
  
“It was mutual.” Dean said shortly, “But it wasn’t-” He groped for a word. “Clean, Bobby. It was messy and unnatural and I feel dirty, like I stuck my hands into a pile of shit and tried to drown myself in it. Only Sam wasn’t the shit, Bobby, I was. Sam was beautiful and perfect and he loves me, God knows why, and I shoved his face in the mud with me and I don’t have time to make it right. I don’t know what to say.”  
  
“Ah” Bobby sipped his beer.  
  
“Ah? What does that mean?” Dean was desperate. “How do I fix this, Bobby?”  
  
“I think you’re pretty much screwed, Dean.” Bobby shook his head. “But I tell you one thing.”  
  
“What?”  
  
“Your kid brother isn’t a kid anymore. He hasn’t been for a long time. I don’t think he thinks you were in the mud together. I think he thinks you don’t want to love him and that’s hurting him more than this shit. I also think he’s afraid of what’s going to happen when you’re gone. You do know you’re his only buffer between good and evil? And when you’re gone, Sam’s got nothing. I think you need to let him fight for you and let him love you before its too late, Dean.”  
  
*  
  
Sam had gone right to their room because he didn’t want to face Bobby right now. He was exhausted and in pain. Dean had been good in the car. He’d said he loved him. Sam knew it was true. He pulled a pillow into his arms and sighed at the size of the old twin bed.  
  
He believed things would be ok, he just wished Dean would believe it too.  
  
*  
  
Dean came in about an hour later and saw that Sam was already asleep. He sat on the edge of his brother’s bed and stared down at him. He wondered if Sam knew just how beautiful he was, how tempting. He felt his brother shudder from cold and rubbed his arm gently. “Shh, Sammy. Sleep. I’m here.”  
  
Sam shifted in his sleep, cuddling closer to his brother’s warmth. “Dean…” He murmured faintly. “Dean?” His eyes barely opened.  
  
“It’s alright, Sam.” Dean eyed the small bed. “Shift over.”  
  
Sam yawned hugely. “There’s not much room to shift.”  
  
“Well turn on your side.” Dean took off his shirt and jeans, leaving only his boxers. “Relax, I’m not going to try anything, I just want to hold you, Ok?”  
  
Sam smiled as the bed groaned from their collective weight. “Good thing, I don’t think the bed would take it.”  
  
He shifted so Dean could get comfortable and wrapped around him. “Dude” Dean said after he noticed how close to the edge of the bed he was. “Bobby needs to upgrade his mattresses. These have been here since I was 8.”  
  
Sam’s feet were sticking off the edge of the bed and he grinned at Dean. “We can put both mattresses on the floor and work them together somehow.”  
  
“Uh, tomorrow, sure,” Dean secured his brother in his arms.  
  
“Dean?” Sam whispered into his neck.  
  
“What?”  
  
“Everything’s going to be ok.” Sam reached up to stroke his brother’s cheek gently.  
  
When he looked into Sam’s eyes, he wanted to believe that things would be alright. Deep down he knew that there was unfinished business in New Hampshire and after what Bobby told him tonight, Dad had been waste deep in it. If they went back he would risk it starting up again.  
  
There was also the problem that Bobby brought to him earlier. Sam needed him. As much as he had been trying to get his brother to let him go it was clear that wasn’t going to happen.  
  
“The Doc is going to come tomorrow.” Dean told Sam. “He’ll look you over. I just want to sleep now and get my head together.”  
  
“Will you be here when I wake up?”  
  
It took Dean several heartbeats to answer honestly. “I’ll be here.”  
  
“No I mean, like this.” Sam whispered, he kissed Dean’s neck tenderly. “I want to wake up in your arms.”  
  
“What if I get a cramp?”  
  
“Dean, I”ve watched you sleep in the same position for ten hours.” Sam smirked.  
  
“Alright, Alright, I won’t get up until you wake up.”  
  
“Cross your heart?”  
  
He was about to say “and hope to die” but instead he stopped himself and pressed a kiss on Sam’s forehead. “Yes.”  
  
TBC 


	12. My Obsession

CHAPTER TWELVE  
  
The first thing Sam realized when he woke up was that he was not alone. The second thing he realized was that he was with Dean and the third thing was that his cock was so hard it had woken him up. Perhaps that had something to do with the location of Dean’s hand on his inner thigh.  
  
If he shifted just a little, Dean’s hand would nudge his cock and provide some friction if he were to move. Downstairs brain….Sam swallowed. He shut it off for a minute because he wanted to bask in the reality of waking up like this and hearing Dean’s heart beat.  
  
Sam smiled because this was all he wanted, all he’d –ever- wanted. It was love, pure and unconditional. He lifted his head up to see if Dean was awake. No, he was sound asleep. Sam grinned and pressed a kiss to his brother’s chest. Still no reaction, he really did sleep like the dead.  
  
Damn these beds and their lack of space. Sam shifted slightly only to find himself pulled tighter into Dean’s arms. “Morning, Sasquatch.” His brother’s voice lightly rumbled into his hair.  
  
“More like afternoon, probably.” Sam didn’t want to move.  
  
“Whatever. My neck is killing me.” Dean complained.  
  
“I’ll rub it for you.” Sam offered.  
  
Dean nuzzled Sam’s hair. “You know what that will lead to.”  
  
“I was kinda hopin’ actually.”  
  
Dean sighed. “Something like this?” He moved his hand down, underneath Sam’s briefs. His fingers lightly rested on the hairs clustered at the base of Sam’s cock. They were soft and tickled his calloused fingertips. “Smooth.” He whispered against Sam’s hair. “Your skin is so soft, Sammy.” He traced little circles in the hair until he began to hear a soft purr. He wrapped his hand around the already stiff cock and started pulling and rubbing earnestly.  
  
Sam’ head lulled back against the pillows and his breath came out in tiny little gasps. His lips parted and he looked up at Dean. “I’m not soft, Dean.” He protested.  
  
“Shhh, relax.” Dean whispered. He rubbed and pulled the twitching cock in the palm of his hand, traced his thumb over the leaking slit and massaged his sacs.  
  
“Uhghhg….” Sam should not have been surprised at how close he was to coming. He bucked a little into Dean’s hand and snickered when the bed groaned under his weight.  
  
“Easy, Baby.” Dean crooned. He watched Sam’s forehead dampen slightly and his brows crinkle. He kissed one of the crinkles and brushed his lips against his lover’s. He didn’t kiss Sam he just watched him, their eyes locked together in heat.  
  
Sam tugged his underwear down, and jolted slightly as he kicked them off to give Dean’s hand more room to play. Oh /God/. What was he doing with his thumb? Rolling it over and over a particular spot he’d never thought was that sensitive. “Dean!” He closed his eyes and clutched his brother’s strong shoulder. It hit him so suddenly he gasped for breath. “Dean! Dean!” He called his brother’s name over and over.  
  
The shuddering continued for about fifteen minutes while he just clung to Dean. “Where in the hell…did you learn that?” Sam finally found his voice.  
  
“I was eighteen…” Dean said with a small grin. “But you don’t want to hear about that. Sammy. You are –so- hot.” He tugged on Sam’s lower lip with his teeth. Their tongues touched and he kept pulling away, teasing. Sam finally gave a frustrated growl and pulled him down to force a long kiss out of his brother.  
  
“And you know a lot of things you shouldn’t.” Sam whispered. “How ‘m I supposed to top that, huh?” He let his hand run over Dean’s chest and flicked his thumb over a nipple teasingly.  
  
“Didn’t say you had to.” Dean murmured.  
  
“You’re hard.” Sam said triumphantly. “Let’s see what I can do about that.”  
  
“I have a feeling nothing I say will stop you from trying to outdo me.” Dean rolled his eyes.  
  
Sam snickered. “You’re getting the picture.”  
  
A loud pounding unfortunately interrupted their haze of pleasure. “Boys? It’s almost noon. Get your asses out of bed. The Doctor will be here in an hour.”  
  
Sam scowled and stuck his tongue out at the door which caused Dean to laugh. “Saved by the bell. Get off me, let’s get cleaned up.”  
  
“Not fair.”  
  
“Sammy…”  
  
“Fine,” Sam groused and untangled himself from Dean.  
  
*  
  
Sam was in the kitchen first. He picked up a biscuit and stuffed it eagerly into his mouth. Home made. Bobby was a good cook, he used to love coming here when he was a kid. “Morning, Sam.” Bobby passed him some coffee. “How’s Dean?”  
  
“Fine” Sam settled into one of the small chairs. He started piling his plate. Bobby had made brunch, Saint that he was.  
  
“You?”  
  
“Spectacular.” Sam shoveled eggs into his mouth.

  
“Uh huh” Bobby rolled his eyes. “Sam, Dean told me what happened.”  
  
Sam nearly chocked. “What?!”  
  
“I think you need to give Dean some space today. Just let him chill and work on the Impala. I got in some new books you can look at.”  
  
Sam just stared at him. “You aren’t at all … upset about this?”  
  
“Saw it coming for a long time.” Bobby shrugged, “Even mentioned it to your Dad once. It doesn’t surprise me in the least.”  
  
“Bobby you never cease to amaze me.” Sam shook his head. “I know he needs to process. I’ve been pushing.”  
  
“Just a bit” Bobby’s comment was an understatement and they both knew it. “You’ve been in each other’s faces way too much the last couple of years. I’d suggest that you take a break but there’s no time for that. It’s best to just give him the time you can. Ok? It’s easy for any demon or spirit to get the better of you like this. Remember what happened last year?”  
  
“Yeah, I remember.” Sam shuddered when he thought of the trickster.  
  
“Just let him chill. Let him work on his car, let him drink some beer and remember who he is.”  
  
Sam sighed, “You’re right.”  
  
“Morning” Dean eyed the coffee and took a whiff. “Good God, Is that real Colombian? Bobby, will you marry me?” He trudged over to snatch a mug and grinned widely.  
  
Bobby cuffed him upside the head.  
  
*  
  
In New Hampshire, Maureen put down her book. “I know you’re there.” She said to thin air. “I’m not calling him back.”  
  
She fingered her medallion. The house shudders shook and she could feel the chill. Her front door banged open.  
  
“I didn’t call John back, and I’m not calling Dean back either. I know you’re hungry, but this has got to stop.”  
  
A boy appeared at her front door, she knew he’d never be able to get inside just as much as she knew who he was. “You let him go.” Its voice was like stone scraping glass. “Just like you take away all my toys when you want to play with them, call him back or I will raise this town until you are the last person standing and you can hear their screams as their flesh peels from their body. He could feed me for a lifetime. Bring him back.”  
  
“Nooo!” She screeched and started to speak in ancient Latin.  
  
*  
  
TBC 


	13. Stray Cat Blues

CHAPTER THIRTEEN   
  
  
“Dean?” The visit from the doctor had been positive. Sam was ok, apart from some abrasion which he’d been given cream for. He’d left Dean alone for most of the day so that he could do his thing. For Dean, it was a kind of Zen to work on his car. Sam always thought his brother would have made one hell of an engineer if he’d paid any attention at all in school. The sun was setting when Sam finally couldn’t stay away any longer.  
  
Dean had his shirt off since it was warm out and his skin glistened in the heat. Sam took a few minutes to just watch him work on the dent. His eyes were drawn to the bulge in Dean’s powerful shoulders. He tracked the trail of a sweat drop as it moved in between his brother’s shoulder blades and disappeared down his back. He decided that he could stand where he was all day and just watch his brother’s body as it glistened.  
  
Dean looked up and rubbed sweat from his forehead. “Hey Sam How’d it go?”  
  
“Went fine, everything’s cool.” Sam made his way over to Dean. “You’re a lot more relaxed.” He observed.  
  
“My car and I were bonding.”  
  
“Dude, if you and your car bonded any more, I’d wonder if she was your real girlfriend.” Sam needed to touch Dean badly but he kept his hands firmly in his pockets.  
  
“So everything is really ok?” Dean washed his hands with a cloth as he looked up at Sam.  
  
“Of course it is, you didn’t hurt me.” Sam smiled, “When are you going to stop it Dean?”  
  
“Stop what?”  
  
“Treating me like a kid. I’m not a kid Dean. I don’t need you to protect me. I need –you-.” Sam’s voice lowered into a heated whisper. “I love you, Dean.”  
  
It was Dean who closed the distance between them this time and pulled Sam into his arms. “I love you too.” He said sharply. “So much, it hurts, Sam. When you’re around, I don’’t know. It’s like there’s an open wound in my chest and I can’t stop the bleeding.”  
  
“Dean.” Sam whispered his brother’s name and curled his fingers in Dean’s hair. “I love you.” He’d say it again and again until Dean finally accepted it. He kissed his ear, jaw and chin. “You can’t do anything to stop me from loving you. I just wish you would love yourself, Dean.” He trailed his fingers up and down his brother’s cheek  
  
“Why do you want me, Sam? You could have anyone, why me?” Dean gazed into his lover’s eyes.  
  
“You honestly don’t know why?” Sam laughed softly. “Dean, you are not just my hero, you are my heart. You jump in to save people without a thought for yourself. You think of nothing but helping others. You’re strong, brave…” He rubbed his brother’s bare chest with a grin. “Sexy, funny… talented…” Sam kissed him lightly. “Especially when it comes to your tongue, and you’re heart. I’ve never met anyone with a heart like yours Dean. You give and you give, you expect nothing back and yet you deserve so much. You gave up everything for me, Dean, and I love you for it.”  
  
“You make me sound like some kind of knight.” Dean scoffed.  
  
“Tarnished Hero, more like, but you are my Prince, Dean, no matter what happens, I’ll always love you.” Sam promised softly.  
  
Dean snorted, “Hmh. I guess I’m stuck with you then.”  
  
“Yeah” Sam nodded. Sam wrapped his arms around Dean and they just stood there, holding each other until Dean frowned. “What?”  
  
“I feel like I’m in an eighties movie, get off me.” Dean tried to shake away from Sam. “If you must be a girl, wear a freakin’ dress.”  
  
“I don’t want to be your –girl- Dean.” Sam held him tighter, refusing to relinquish the moment. “I want to be your lover and I want you to want it to.”  
  
Dean sighed, “It’s not that I don’t want it, Sam. You know there’s no future in it. You know what’s going to happen to me.”  
  
“Don’t care.” Sam nuzzled Dean’s neck. “I really don’t care, Dean. Kiss me.”  
  
Dean was quiet for a long moment then finally nodded. “Alright, you win.” He smiled faintly “I don’t want to fight anymore.” He lifted Sam’s chin and kissed him softly.  
  
The sweet tender kiss soon heightened to a frenzy of passion. Dean tugged at Sam’s jeans, snapping a button loose in the process. The zipper easily came open. Sam pulled at Dean’s, reveling in the fact that his brother was already bare-chested. “Oh god, yes!” Sam whimpered when Dean cupped his cock and squeezed it. “I gotta have you, Dean. Now, please!”  
  
He didn’t care that they were outside in broad daylight. He kicked off his shoes and pants didn’t give Dean any time to get his jeans completely off before he wrapped himself around his brother.  
  
“Oof!” Dean grunted. He had to use the Impala as leverage to keep Sam –up-. Shit he was heavy. Sam wrapped his legs around Dean and pulled him in close. “If you fucking dent my car..” Dean couldn’t finish the words because Sam had claimed his tongue again.  
  
“Fuck me.” Sam begged Dean. “Please, love. I need to feel you.” He panted against Dean’s lips.  
  
“No lube…” Dean managed to think.  
  
Sam pulled a small tube from his shirt pocket. “No excuses, just –fuck- me.”  
  
Since Dean was busy keeping Sam steady, his brother opened the lube and reached down to swath his already hard shaft. For a few minutes after he’d slipped on a condom he just pulled on Dean’s cock, feeling it in his hands and holding it next to his own. “We go so well together.” Sam whispered. Gimme one of your hands.”  
  
Dean strained to hold Sam up with one arm and braced them against the car. It was a good thing he owned heavy cars. He slipped his hand behind Sam’s ass and began to prepare him. “You sure the doc…”  
  
“Do it, Dean.” Sam commanded sharply. “I’m –fine-“ He kissed and licked his brother’s jaw. “Mmmm…” He whispered as he felt Dean’s fingers start to work inside him.  
  
“So tight.” Dean moaned. “Gonna hurt you again.”  
  
“No.” Sam whispered. “You’re not. I’m ready Dean.” He panted, lips parted eagerly. “I’m ready and I want you. Don’t hold back.”  
  
The car shook when Dean touched Sam’s prostrate and he shuddered with the impact. “Oh fuck—oh god… Dean!” He cried out. “Goddamnit, NOW… now… aughh…” Sam keened. He could feel his body already spiraling towards orgasm and it was all he could do to keep it from happening. Dean removed his fingers and positioned himself and slowly pushed into his brother.  
  
For the time it took Dean to push himself to the hilt the whole world stopped. Sam clutched his lover’s shoulders and they stared at each other. “Move.” Sam nudged Dean’s chin with his lips. “Take me high, Dean.”  
  
And he did. They were so far gone they didn’t notice that Bobby was coming around the corner with a printout.  
  
Bobby stopped in his tracks and his eyes just about popped out of his head. He swore, cleared his throat and turned right away. The article could wait.  
  
He didn’t think the boys needed to know that Vale End had been destroyed just yet. It had taken someone with powerful magical energy to do what had been reported as a simple seismic disturbance.  
  
It was clear to him that witchcraft had been a large part of situation. Maybe Maureen Spaulding had done the right thing after all.  
  
TBC 


	14. Love In Vain

CHAPTER FOURTEEN  
  
“Sammy” Dean panted into his brother’s neck. “Sammy” The sound was a soft little prayer as he held his brother in his arms.  
  
“I’m alright, Dean.” Sam whispered. “God you feel so good.” He was still propped up against the Impala, wrapped around Dean’s waist. He didn’t care that there was no bed to fall back against that all they had around them was the open air and the smell of sweat and sex. His fingers played with hair on the back of Dean’s head.  
  
There was no going back now, not for either of them. They were in it all or nothing now, at least Sam was. He encouraged Dean to lift his head so he could see his brother’s eyes. “I’ve wanted you forever, Dean.” Sam assured him softly.  
  
“Mmm” Dean purred and licked his lips. “So does this mean you really –are- my bitch now, Sammy?” His eyes glinted and he pinched Sam’s ass affectionately.  
  
“I’m not even going to dignify that with a comeback, you know you’re a Jerk.” Sam said with a huff. “But you’re my Jerk.” He leant his forehead against Dean’s. “And I wouldn’t have you any other way.”  
  
Dean rolled his eyes, “You’re getting kind of heavy, Sam, and I think you dented my car.”  
  
He let his brother down slowly after he pulled out and Sam pressed up against him. He didn’t want to lose the contact with Dean just yet. Apparently he still had his shirt on, though his jeans were in a pile nearby. He just smiled at Dean and kissed him again. Sam crouched down to pull his brother’s jeans up and grinned at the look on Dean’s face when he tucked his cock neatly back inside his boxers. Sam zipped and buttoned Dean’s jeans and smiled as he rubbed it through the denim. “This belongs to me now, Dean.” Sam whispered. “See that you remember that.”  
  
Sam found his jeans and tossed them over his shoulder, they button was ruined so he’d have to repair them before putting them back on. He stepped into his boxers and found one boot under the Impala. He was in the process of locating his other shoe when Bobby called from the other side of the house.  
  
“Is it safe to come out there? Are you two decent yet?”  
  
Sam gave a choking noise as Dean called back. “Yeah, Sam’s just looking for a boot.”  
  
Bobby came out and shielded his eyes as soon as he saw Sam was not yet fully clothed and Dean was still shirtless. “Christ.” He swore and shook his head. “Do I need to give you money for clothes?”  
  
Dean laughed in clear amusement as he reached for a t-shirt. “Got that covered, Bobby.”  
  
Sam just flushed as he found his shoe finally. “What is it?” He cleared his throat, trying to pretend everything was completely normal.  
  
“I came across an article, boys. Vale End has been destroyed. It looks like there was an explosion. I think you can safely say that your friend finally decided to end what was happening there. It takes some charm to get a witch to do the right thing.” Bobby snorted. “Personally, I think John should have gone back a long time ago and finished the job. Witches” Bobby spat, “They’re worse than demons.”  
  
“So I don’t have to worry about this thing fuckin’ with my head anymore?” Dean asked.  
  
“Looks like it” Bobby nodded.  
  
“Thank you, Maureen” Dean grinned.  
  
Sam looked sad, though, and a little upset. “She’s dead then? Did the article mention her death? She really did help us, Dean and she helped Dad too. She was good. I’d hate to think that she suffered because she helped us.”  
  
“Oh God, tell me you don’t want to go back there.” Dean eyed his brother. “Sammy…”  
  
“Shouldn’t we go and just make sure?” Sam twisted his fingers in his jeans. “We owe it to her.”  
  
“Sam. For once, just for once, can we just let it go?” Dean threw up his hands. “I’m not going back there after everything that’s happened especially since I don’t have time to mess around. Sammy… Baby, listen to me.” He reached for his brother’s sleeve. “As far as I’m concerned, every –minute- counts from now on, ok? I don’t want to waste time looking for a witch who may or may not be dead.”  
  
They were words that Sam had longed to hear from Dean since he’d heard his brother only had one year to live. One fucking year, and as much as he wanted to listen to Dean he knew he couldn’t rest until he knew for sure that Maureen wasn’t hurt or suffering. “Dean“ He gave his brother a pleading look. “I love you for that, but we can’t just ignore what she did.”  
  
Dean looked at Bobby for help who held up both his hands, “Oh, no.” Bobby shook his head. “You boys need to sort this one out yourselves.”  
  
Dean gave an exasperated sigh and looked down at the ground, the Impala, then to Sam. “We’re not going.” He told Sam impatiently. “We’re just not, and that’s final.” They stood for a few minutes just glaring at each other. He was half afraid that Sam would not back down.  
  
It was Sam who looked away from Dean finally. “Bobby?”  
  
Bobby looked up, “Yeah?”  
  
“Do you happen to have some extra buttons and a needle and thread? I need to repair my jeans.” He refused to look at Dean, still obviously upset.  
  
“Jesus Christ.” Dean muttered under his breath and folded his arms.  
  
“Yeah, I’ll find ‘em for you.” Bobby nodded.  
  
Sam exhaled and followed Bobby into the house. He took the sewing materials from Bobby and went to their room. He started to repair his jeans and just finally threw them down in frustration. He thought about going himself and then quickly decided against that. Dean was right, every minute did count and he couldn’t begin to think of leaving Dean right now. Especially not after everything that had happened.  
  
Sam lay face down on his bed as he thought about Dean and their situation now. He should be happy. He should be fucking dancing with joy and he should not be heartsick. He had a relationship with Dean now that was everything he’d always wanted. Maybe Dean was right and he should just let it go. He couldn’t follow up on every problem and issue they ever came across especially now.  
  
He also couldn’t afford to fight with Dean. There just wasn’t time for that. Sam sighed and curled up on his bed. Sex was so good with Dean. Kissing Dean was like holding on to heaven. How could he possibly –let- that go? He just couldn’t.  
  
He rose from the bed just as Dean came into the room. “Dean, I-“  
  
“Sam, I-“  
  
“Dean, you’re right.” Sam said before Dean could say anything else. “She let us go and we shouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth. I don’t want to fight, ok?” Sam smiled at his brother.  
  
“Sam, I was just going to say we should go and make sure it’s finished. You’re the one who’s right. She helped us and we owe her that much. So, let’s go.” Dean said with a tentative, yet hopeful grin.  
  
Sam eyed his brother “You sure about this?”  
  
Dean nodded, “Yeah.”  
  
“I love you, Dean.” Sam whispered as his eyes shimmered.  
  
“Yeah, well. Me too” Dean grunted and strode to get his duffle bag.  
  
TBC 


	15. Let It Bleed

CHAPTER FIFTEEN  
  
Sam had to admit that the drive back had been a lot better than the drive to Bobby’s. Dean was animated and they talked and joked. It really helped that his brother was starting to deal with the situation between them. Sam felt a little lightheaded from the fact that he could be so open with Dean finally. It was strange. Dean was his lover now. He accepted that and understood it. It scared him, because of what he knew might happen, but it was also a relief after years of wondering.  
  
They were back to their easy banter yes, but it was –more- than that. He could feel it in Dean’s demeanor, in his eyes and just the way he spoke. He no longer had that defeatist attitude, there was hope. It was a small hope, but there was hope that if they stuck together they could fight anything unnatural that came their way.  
  
“Where do you want to go after this?” Sam asked Dean.  
  
“I don’t know” Dean shrugged. “You pick a place.”  
  
“Me?” Sam looked surprised, ‘I thought you had the next few months all mapped out as to what you wanted to do.”  
  
“I did.” Dean smiled, “But I thought you’d want to have a choice in this.” He turned off at a gas station since they needed to fill up the car.  
  
A choice.  
  
“Think about it.” Dean grinned as he got out of the Impala. “Anywhere you want to go, Sam.”  
  
“I’m just happy being with you, Dean.” Sam said softly.  
  
Dean just scoffed, “C’mon, really think about it.” He encouraged his brother as he started to fill the tank.  
  
Sam looked back. “I don’t know man. I’m having trouble getting past the whole it’s my choice, thing and you’ll go anywhere I tell you to.”  
  
“Dude, within reason” Dean said as an afterthought.  
  
“hm. I’ll get back to you.” Sam gave a grin. Well, this brought a lot of possibilities to mind.  
  
*  
  
They finally made it back to Vale End and Sam had them go to the address Maureen had given him. Her house was large on the top of small hill and seemed as though someone was still living there. Sam frowned as they pulled up with the Impala. A boy was sitting on a swing. He was the same boy that Sam remembered from the graveyard. His eyes were normal though and he did not seem to recognize Sam at all. Also, he was in contemporary clothing.  
  
“Hi, I’m Sam.” Sam said to the boy, who looked up at him. “We’re friends of Maureen Spaulding.”  
  
“Mama’s in the house.” The boy’s accent was clearly not American.  
  
Dean glanced at the boy with a frown and then to Sam. The door opened when he knocked and Maureen stood there. Well, she looked like she was Maureen, but she seemed quite a lot older.  
  
Sam frowned. no she seemed a lot older, like she’d aged a good ten years. “Maureen?” He looked at her. “I’d heard you died…”  
  
“Sam? Sam Winchester.” Maureen looked him over and smiled. “You came back here. I thought you would stay away. I fixed everything you know.”  
  
“I heard, Maureen. This is my brother, Dean. He’s fine now. What happened?”  
  
“You’ve met James.” Maureen said softly. “He’s been trapped for a very long time, Sam. I had to free him to stop everything from happening. It took a lot out of me but I did save him. He’s Mary Ritter’s lost son. I pulled him out and Vale end was destroyed in the process.”  
  
“It looks like you paid the price for it.” Sam said. “You’re saying you pulled him out? From where?”  
  
“Hell, where he was.”  
  
Sam glanced at Dean, then back to Maureen. “How did you do that?”  
  
“I paid the price.” Maureen looked down at the ground.  
  
“How many years did you have, Maureen?” Sam frowned.  
  
“You don’t understand, Sam. I have until I die, but that will be soon as the spell I used aged me 30 years. I had to pay one year for each victim James has slain.”  
  
“Don’t even think about it.” Dean barked at Sam. “Maureen, look, it was nice meeting you, but we have to get going now. We just wanted to make sure everything was alright.” He turned on his heel and stalked off. “Sammy!” He called sharply.  
  
“Maureen, will you do me a favor and send the information to this address.” Sam quickly wrote down Bobby’s address. “I’d be eternally grateful.” He glanced back at Dean who was already in the Impala and starting the engine.  
  
“Sure, Sam. You take care now. I’m glad your brother is ok.”  
  
*  
  
“Sam, so help me if you try that…” Dean was furious.  
  
“It’s an option, look how many people have you killed? One, two?”

  
“What if it’s not people, Sam? What if its things too? No, we’re not taking that risk, you’re not taking that risk. Get it the hell out of your head. I want you to swear to me you won’t, Sammy.”  
  
“Alright, Dean” Sam looked him right in the eye. “I promise.”  
  
Dean stopped the car and reached over to kiss Sam thoroughly on the lips. “If it happens, Sammy, I don’t want to pay for my freedom with your life. I’d rather burn.”  
  
Sam nodded faintly as he gave Dean a reassuring smile. “I understand.”  
  
Dean started the car again.  
  
“So where are we going?”  
  
Sam smiled. “South Beach”  
  
“Sam?”  
  
“Hm?”  
  
“I love you.” Dean told him sincerely.  
  
“Me too” Sam smiled widely.  
  
In the back of his mind he filed away the thought that had been planted in his head. There was one way to get Dean out of hell, now. As much as his brother would rather burn there than let anything happen to Sam, he would do whatever it takes to free Dean from eternal torment.

Whatever he could.  
  
-Finis- 


End file.
